To shafts of fortune and blows of friends or enemies then, the ironist
is almost impregnable. He knows how to parry each thrust and prepare
for every emergency. Even if the arrows reach him, all the poison has
been sucked out of them by his clear, resolute understanding of their
significance. There is but one weak spot in his armor, but one disaster
that he fears more almost than the loss of his life,--a shrinkage of
his environment, a running dry of experience. He fears to be cut off
from friends and crowds and human faces and speech and books, for
he demands to be ceaselessly fed. Like a modern city, he is totally
dependent on a steady flow of supplies from the outside world, and
will be in danger of starvation, if the lines of communication are
interrupted. Without people and opinions for his mind to play on, his
irony withers and faints. He has not the faculty of brooding; he cannot
mine the depths of his own soul, and bring forth after labor mighty
nuggets of thought. The flow and swirl of things is his compelling
interest. His thoughts are reactions, immediate and vivid, to his daily
experience. Some deep, unconscious brooding must go on, to produce that
happy precision of judgment of his; but it is not voluntary. He is
conscious only of the shifting light and play of life; his world is
dynamic, energetic, changing. He lives in a world of relations, and he
must have a whole store of things to be related. He has lost himself
completely in this world he lives in. His ironical interpretation
of the world is his life, and this world is his nourishment. Take
away this environmental world and you have slain his soul. He is
invulnerable to everything except that deprivation.
V
THE EXCITEMENT OF FRIENDSHIP
My friends, I can say with truth, since I have no other treasure,
are my fortune. I really live only when I am with my friends. Those
sufficient persons who can pass happily long periods of solitude
communing with their own thoughts and nourishing their own souls
fill me with a despairing admiration. Their gift of auto-stimulation
argues a personal power which I shall never possess. Or else it
argues, as I like to think in self-defense, a callousness of spirit,
an insensitiveness to the outside influences which nourish and sustain
the more susceptible mind. And those persons who can shut themselves
up for long periods and work out their thoughts alone, constructing
beautiful and orderly representations of their own spirits, are to me a
continual mystery. I know this is the way that things are accomplished,
that “monotony and solitude” are necessary for him who would produce
creative thought. Yet, knowing well this truth, I shun them both. I am
a battery that needs to be often recharged. I require the excitement
of friendship; I must have the constant stimulation of friends. I do
not spark automatically, but must have other minds to rub up against,
and strike from them by friction the spark that will kindle my thoughts.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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