Once when Merrick returned from a visit home, he brought with him a
singularly feeling and suggestive bas-relief of a thin, faded old woman,
sitting and sewing something pinned to her knee; while a full-lipped,
full-blooded little urchin, his trousers held up by a single gallows,
stood beside her, impatiently twitching her gown to call her attention to
a butterfly he had caught. Steavens, impressed by the tender and delicate
modelling of the thin, tired face, had asked him if it were his mother.
He remembered the dull flush that had burned up in the sculptor's face.
The lawyer was sitting in a rocking-chair beside the coffin, his head
thrown back and his eyes closed. Steavens looked at him earnestly,
puzzled at the line of the chin, and wondering why a man should conceal a
feature of such distinction under that disfiguring shock of beard.
Suddenly, as though he felt the young sculptor's keen glance, Jim Laird
opened his eyes.
"Was he always a good deal of an oyster?" he asked abruptly. "He was
terribly shy as a boy."
"Yes, he was an oyster, since you put it so," rejoined Stevens. "Although
he could be very fond of people, he always gave one the impression of
being detached. He disliked violent emotion; he was reflective, and
rather distrustful of himself--except, of course, as regarded his work.
He was sure enough there. He distrusted men pretty thoroughly and women
even more, yet somehow without believing ill of them. He was determined,
indeed, to believe the best; but he seemed afraid to investigate."
"A burnt dog dreads the fire," said the lawyer grimly, and closed his
eyes.
Steavens went on and on, reconstructing that whole miserable boyhood. All
this raw, biting ugliness had been the portion of the man whose mind was
to become an exhaustless gallery of beautiful impressions--so sensitive
that the mere shadow of a poplar leaf flickering against a sunny wall
would be etched and held there for ever. Surely, if ever a man had the
magic word in his finger tips, it was Merrick. Whatever he touched, he
revealed its holiest secret; liberated it from enchantment and restored
it to its pristine loveliness. Upon whatever he had come in contact with,
he had left a beautiful record of the experience--a sort of ethereal
signature; a scent, a sound, a colour that was his own.
Steavens understood now the real tragedy of his master's life; neither
love nor wine, as many had conjectured; but a blow which had fallen
earlier and cut deeper than anything else could have done--a shame not
his, and yet so unescapably his, to bide in his heart from his very
boyhood. And without--the frontier warfare; the yearning of a boy, cast
ashore upon a desert of newness and ugliness and sordidness, for all that
is chastened and old, and noble with traditions.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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