“You speak as if you yourself had loved, Doctor,” said Gervase, with a
half smile.
“And so I have,” replied the Doctor, calmly. “I have loved to the full
as passionately and ardently as even you can love. I thank God the
woman I loved died,--I could never have possessed her, for she was
already wedded,--and I would not have disgraced her by robbing her
from her lawful husband. So Death stepped in and gave her to
me--forever!” and he raised his eyes to the solemn starlit sky. “Yes,
nothing can ever come between us now; no demon tears her white soul
from me; she died innocent of evil, and she is mine--mine in every
pulse of her being, as we shall both know hereafter!”
His face, which was not remarkable for any beauty of feature, grew
rapt and almost noble in its expression, and Gervase looked at him
with a faint touch of ironical wonder.
“Upon my word, your morality almost outreaches your mysticism!” he
said. “I see you are one of those old-fashioned men who think marriage
a sacred sort of thing and the only self-respecting form of love.”
“Old-fashioned I may be,” replied Dr. Dean; “but I certainly believe
in marriage for the woman’s sake. If the license of men were not
restrained by some sort of barrier it would break all bounds. Now I,
had I chosen, could have taken the woman I loved to myself; it needed
but a little skilful persuasion on my part, for her husband was a
drink-sodden ruffian …”
“And why, in the name of Heaven, did you not do so?” demanded Gervase
impatiently.
“Because I know the end of all such _liaisons_,” said the Doctor
sadly. “A month or two of delirious happiness, then years of remorse
to follow. The man is lowered in his own secret estimation of himself,
and the woman is hopelessly ruined, socially and morally. No, Death is
far better; and in my case Death has proved a good friend, for it has
given me the spotless soul of the woman I loved, which is far fairer
than her body was.”
“But, unfortunately, intangible!” said Gervase, satirically.
The Doctor looked at him keenly and coldly.
“Do not be too sure of that, my friend! Never talk about what you do
not understand; you only wander astray. The spiritual world is a blank
to you, so do not presume to judge of what you will never realize
_till realization is forced upon you_!”
He uttered the last words with slow and singular emphasis.
“Forced upon me?” began Gervase. “What do you mean? …”
He broke off abruptly, for at that moment Denzil Murray emerged from
the doorway of the hotel, and came towards them with an unsteady,
swaying step like that of a drunken man.
“You had better go in to the Princess,” he said, staring at Gervase
with a wild smile; “she is waiting for you!”
“What’s the matter with you, Denzil?” inquired Dr. Dean, catching him
by the arm as he made a movement to go on and pass them.
Denzil stopped, frowning impatiently.
“Matter? Nothing! What should be the matter?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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