Zones of the Spirit: A Book of ThoughtsStrindberg, August
Religion
Zones of the Spirit: A Book of Thoughts
Strindberg, August
Swedish literature
=The Art of Settling Accounts.=--The teacher continued: "It really
looks as though we could not go hence till everything is settled,
great and small alike. Recently there died an early friend of mine,
who, at an important juncture, had helped me with a hundred kronas.[1]
I had at first regarded it as a loan. But he never dunned me, and
during the forty years which have since elapsed he was gradually
transformed in my memory into a benefactor, and all was well. When at
last he died a millionaire, I did not wish to trouble his executors
with the trifle, but sent a wreath to the funeral with a sigh of
gratitude and many kindly thoughts. Was that the end? No! Shortly
afterwards I felt a kind of inward admonition to resume relations
with a bookbinder whom I had ceased to employ on account of his
carelessness. He came and was glad to get work again; he was greatly
pleased, and declared that I had appeared just in time to deliver him.
When I understood his difficulties, for he had a family, I was willing
to give him fifty kronas in advance, but as I had no change I gave him
a hundred, though reluctantly. I saw how his back straightened itself,
and his confidence in life reawoke. He went--and never returned. I was
angry at first, because he had treated me like a fool, and I dunned
him with letters. But then the memory of my departed friend recurred;
various thoughts wove themselves together in my mind--the pleasure
of calling him a scamp, the fifty-krona note which had turned into a
hundred-krona note, the scamp's need, and the part I had played as
deliverer. In my own mind I gave him a discharge, and became quite
quiet."
[Footnote 1: A krona = 1s. 3d.]
=Growing Old Gracefully.=--The teacher continued: "When one
becomes old, one wonders at first how men have, as it were, permission
to do one an injustice. If one complains, one finds no sympathy. Even
our friends take the part of those who injure us. But when we have
discovered the secret of it, we take it all quietly. One is cheated
in ordinary business, and says to oneself, 'This is in requital for
that.' Our children prove ungrateful and difficult to manage, exactly
like we were. Young people are insolent and pert towards us, and we
see our former selves reflected in them. Servants do their work badly,
and perpetrate petty thefts; we must put up with it, when we think of
our own work scamped on various occasions. Friends are faithless, just
as we have been ourselves. By practice one comes at last so far, that
one asks for no more, demands no more, and is no longer angry. I then
always think of David when Shimei cast stones at him and cursed him,
and Abishai wanted to strike off the calumniator's head. David declined
to take vengeance, saying, 'Let him curse, for the Lord hath bidden
him.' When the same king, because of his sins, had to choose between
famine, pestilence, or raids of the enemy, he prayed 'to fall into the
hands of God, and not into the hands of man.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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