"Because he forced me to. He drank so horribly. He was like a madman
most of the time. He gambled recklessly--more than once he struck me. I
stayed by him as long as I could, and then one night he treated me so
cruelly I had to leave him. I was afraid for my life. I had already met
Mr. Latham. He fell in love with me, and he urged me all the time to
leave Gerald. But I would not have left him, I swear to you, if he had
not treated me so violently. Mr. Latham was rich I know, and Gerald then
had little money left. But it was not that that took me. I was in daily,
hourly terror of him. Oh, Miriam, you cannot imagine how he was. That
night I tell you of, I left him. I went with Mr. Latham to Italy, and
there we were married. He was more than good to me, far better I know
than I deserved. I was prepared to make amends for my past life, and at
least to be a good wife to him. But fate determined, I suppose, that I
should suffer, for he died--died when we had been married only a few
months. And now I am alone, and oh, so wretched, Miriam, so terribly
unhappy."
She burst into tears.
"Hilda, don't--I, too, am alone. Believe me, I forgive you if it is my
forgiveness you would have. You have been wrong; but I was wrong, I
think, in the beginning, too--towards Gerald. I ought to have left
things to take their chance. But what I did, I did to save him. For that
I was punished. God knows what I have suffered. But, come now, even
though you are alone, you have your father and mother----"
"My father and mother! Don't name them to me. I hate them. To them I owe
the whole failure of my life. They had no right to bring children into
the world, and allow them to grow up weeds. I wish never to see either
of them again. No, I am going back to Italy. I shall find some niche to
fill there I suppose. But I could not stay here. All I wanted was to
know that you forgave me. You have been so good, Miriam, and if you
forgive me, I can bear the rest. And, Miriam----"
"Yes, Hilda."
"You will marry John Dundas? Don't be angry with me, but if you are
happy, I should feel my life was easier. John is good, Miriam, he is one
of the best of men--I never deserved him. You do. Let me feel that you
won't--that the past won't stand in your way. He deserves to be happy."
"He has been very good to me, Hilda, very kind. I know what you must
feel. Let us both try and forget."
"Say again that you forgive me, Miriam."
"Freely, Hilda. I forgive."
"Good bye. You will write and tell me--any news?"
"I will write, Hilda; good-bye."
As she left the room Miriam could bear up no longer. She threw herself
on the sofa, and cried as if her heart would break.
* * * * *