5th.—The Ladies' Brazen Monument to the Duke of Wellington, having been _smoked_ a good deal of late, its noble proprietresses determined on giving it an autumnal washing before the fall of the leaf. For this purpose, the (Holy) Alliance Company lent their engine, a fiery Marquess played the pipe, and a committee of Countesses worked the pumps. The figure was then invested in a new shirt, presented by Her Majesty, against the cold weather. 20th.—A sailing party from Margate, finding themselves near _Urn_ bay, resolved to drink _tea_. Mrs. Bullion, of Cheapside, one of the company, proposed music in the air, and, being inspired by the water, volunteered "The Land;" but, in getting up to C above, she overreached herself, and fell into the sea below. At first, Mr. Bullion feared she would prove _dead stock_ on his hands, but he soon saw she was _floating, capital_; so he bargained with some _dredgers_ to give her an _hoister_ on board again. The _natives_ were greatly alarmed at the occurrence. OCT. 3rd.—Mrs. Belasco delivered her concluding Lecture on morality, with illustrations, in the Saloon of the Haymarket Theatre. 7th.—The Penitentiary at Millbank was partly destroyed by fire; luckily the flames were extinguished, without making an auto-da-fé of the fair penitents, many of whom were insured by destiny from that sort of untimely end. The treadmill was unfortunately burnt, to the great inconvenience of several industrious persons who were practising on it, to qualify themselves for places of service where there was a good deal of running upstairs. 12th.—The paupers of Gripeham workhouse having been, under the new law, deprived of their tobacco, deputed one old woman, as the _organ_ of the rest, to demand a restoration of their _pipes_. The overseers withstood her _fire_, and refused her _smoke_; however, at the suggestion of one of their body who had learned Latin, they consented to allow her a "_Quid_ pro quo."