"See how thou wouldst have beggared thy Boy with Genius," continued the Thunderer. "And now listen how I have enriched him with Deformity. He shall go forth a wonder to the staring and senseless world. Monarchs shall smile upon him, and rejoice to gird his neck with precious Jewels. He shall be the beloved of Matrons, and the fondling of Damsels. Crowds shall flock to behold him, heaping his little lap with countless riches and costly gifts. His car shall be drawn through the public ways in triumph; and he—the stunted dwarf—shall play the Giant Emperor among men. Thank thou, then, the Gods, oh Woman! whose bounty has given thee a Dwarf, and not a Genius for thy Child." Thus spake the mighty Jove, and the Mother in gratitude cried out:— "Oh, Jupiter! King of the Heavens, and Ruler of the Earth! I thank thee! for now I see thou hast, indeed, vouchsafed that my Boy shall be the most admired of all thy Children—the richest—the happiest of Men." [Illustration: Perrot teaching the Gods and Goddesses how to dance. ] [Illustration: Minerva, as she did appear at the Italian Opera. ] [Illustration: Minerva, as she ought to have appeared at the Italian Opera. ] [Illustration: Neptune, as he probably will appear at the Italian Opera. ] A MONO-RHYME. Oh, Monsieur Perrot! oh, Monsieur Perrot! Whatever on earth could have made you do so? Put the Judgment of Paris all into dumb-show! Bring the Gods and the Goddesses down from _en haut_! Paris—Mercury—Venus—Minerva—Juno— To trip "on the light fantastic toe!" For who ever heard of a Fandango— A Gavotte—a Cotillion—a Bolero— Balancez—avancez—chaine des dames—dos-à-dos, Or indeed any _pas_ (excepting a "_faux_") Perform'd by a Goddess, I'd like to know? Whate'er in the name, too, of Lemprière and Co., Could have made it come into your head to bestow On the Goddess of Wisdom, so _comme il faut_, And who Keightley informs us was "chaste as snow," A petticoat scarcely, Sir, reaching below The knees of the lady—and looking as though 'Twas a kilt of book-muslin or calico! Whereas every classical cameo Assures us she usen't her legs to show— Perhaps they were bandy and form'd like a bow— Or her ankles were gummy—but whether or no Sure the Goddess half-naked objected to go. Now it wouldn't have been such a dreadful blow, And to Mamselle Minerva much more _à propos_, Had you comb'd back the hair of the Virago— Dress'd it _à la Chinoise_ 'stead of _en Bandeau_— While a pair of "blue specs" would have served to throw Round the Goddess of Wisdom a learned halo! But short Petticoats surely are rather _de trop_ For the Sapient Minerva and Stately Juno!! Then Oh, Mister Lumley! Oh, Monsieur Perrot!