The Comic Almanack, Volume 2: An Ephemeris in Jest and Earnest, Containing Merry Tales, Humerous Poetry, Quips, and Oddities
David Hume · en
and every washerwoman's drying-ground will be an exhibition, to which
the public will be admitted without having to pay a shilling to witness
the pictures. A catalogue, in fact, could be drawn up, and might run as
follows:—
EXHIBITION OF SHIRTS IN THE WASHING ACADEMY OF MRS. TUBBS AND
JACK TOWELL, ESQ., BALL'S POND.
1. Portrait of a Fat Cook, in the possession of A 1 and B 2.
2. A Lion's Head, sketched from a celebrated door-knocker in
Portland Place, which was taken off on November 15, 1842, by a noble
marquis.
3. Cleopatra, a beautiful pug, and Sulky Bob, a lovely terrier,
belonging to the Houndsditch Stunner.
4. The Last o' Peel—Sir Robert tendering his resignation to Her
Majesty.
5. Leg of mutton and trimmings—the shirt of an alderman.
6. Views of Canterbury and York cathedrals—The two sleeves of a
bishop.
7. A Soldier's Beer, and Relieving Guard; the shirt of two Blues—The
souvenirs of a housemaid.
8. "'Till so gently stealing;" Jack Sheppard helping himself in Mr.
Wood's shop—The shirt of a young gentleman in Field Lane.
9. The Last Man—the property of a life-pill manufacturer.
10. St. George's, Hanover Square—The bosom comforter of a young
lady.
11. "When hollow hearts shall wear a mask;" a view of Jullien's
Masquerade—A False Front, late the property of a medical student,
but now belonging to his cherished Uncle.
12. Distant view of Reading—The shirt of a critic.
13. Polly, a celebrated Hampshire pig, who won the prize for short
snouts and curly tails, at the Royal Agricultural Show, 1845—The
chemise of Mr. Giblett.
A LONDON INTERIOR.
If you have ever been to the Casino, you must have seen young Watts
O'Clock. He aspired, in his Gentish soul, to be "a Fast Man;" and
certainly his ambition was gratified, for he was universally looked upon
as the "Fastest of the Fast." He went so fast that eventually he
disappeared altogether.
I was going home very late, one dark morning, when I heard my name
called out. I looked up, and noticed before my door an immense
advertising van. The name issued again from one of the little windows at
the side, and, lo! I recognised the Roman nose of Watts O'Clock peeping
through it. Where there is a nose, I said, there must be a face; and if
there is a face, it is highly probable that there is a body somewhere to
it.
"Come up, my boy," the same voice and nose continued. I needed no
further invitation. In another minute I was inside the van. True enough,
it was young Watts. The interior was fitted up not very stylishly, but
just as good as any lodging-house. The walls were papered with a
handsome pattern, at three-halfpence a yard. In one corner of the room
was a turn-up bedstead, and in the other a large sofa. A table and two
chairs completed the furniture—with a meerschaum and a lucifer-box.
"Glad to see you," he said; "make yourself at home."