Alizon was genuinely glad to see him, as in spite of her desire not to
do so she missed her husband more than she cared to say, and Gartney's
bright, cheerful talk was a great pleasure to her. Besides, the child
was fond of him, and that counted for a great deal in the eyes of the
young mother, who was never tired of telling her complaisant visitor
about the pretty ways and infantile tricks of her treasure.
As a rule, he rode over in the afternoon and stayed to dinner, after
which, he returned to Castle Grim in the shadows of the summer
twilight. What long conversations they used to have on the terrace in
the gloaming, talks about books, and the burning questions of the day,
and travels in far distant lands. Eustace found his companion
singularly charming from an intellectual point of view, as, during her
lonely girlhood, she had read a great deal, and moreover, remembered
what she had read.
They never touched on the subject of their first conversation,
however, as Alizon entrenched herself within her reserve, and refused
to be drawn into further argument in the matter. Under these
circumstances, Eustace was unable to tell whether he had made any
impression upon her, and was forced to play the part of an ordinary
friend, a _rôle_ not at all to his liking.
After all, it was very questionable whether this platonism would
change to a warmer feeling, as the cold demeanour of Alizon entirely
forbade, in a tacit manner, any over-stepping of the limit of
friendship. Eustace, owing to his inherent cynicism, and peculiar mode
of life, had not much belief in woman, but this time he was obliged to
confess to himself that he had not entirely mastered the feminine sex.
He loved her devotedly--the actual woman this time--for the pale,
virginal vision which had haunted his brain during his travels in
Arabia had entirely vanished, and in place of this unsatisfying dream,
he adored the living, breathing woman herself. Doubtless he invested
the reality with many of the attributes of the ideal, but, at the same
time, he found in Alizon Errington the first companion of the other
sex, who satisfied his artistic eye and his intellectual desires.
Could he have married her, he would have been perfectly happy, and
forgotten the old, empty, aimless existence of the past, but, as it
was impossible, seeing she was the wife of another man, he could only
stand outside the gates of the Paradise he could never hope to enter,
and envy the impossible.