409. Lord Falkland, the author of the play, called The Marriage Night, was chosen very young to sit in parliament; and when he was first elected, some of the members opposed his admission, urging, That he had not sown all his wild oats. Then, replied he, it will be the best way to sow them in the house, where there are so many geese to pick them up. 410. The Duke of ― asked a friend, Who he thought had undertaken the most difficult task, Mr. Whiston, in his attempts to discover the longitude, or Mr. Lisle, to find the philosopher’s stone? The friend answered, that he could not tell which was the more arduous task of the two which those gentlemen had undertaken, but he was sure that he had himself engaged in a much more difficult work than either of them. What is that? said his grace. I have been these six years endeavouring to prevail on you to pay your debts, replied the friend. 411. A schoolmaster asking one of his boys, in a sharp wintry morning, what was Latin for cold, the boy hesitated a little: What, sirrah, said he, can’t you tell? Yes, yes, replied the boy, I have it at my fingers’ ends. 412. When the gate, which joined to Whitehall, was ordered by the House of Commons to be pulled down, to make the coach-way more open and commodious, a member made a motion, that the other which was contiguous to it, might be taken down at the same time; which was opposed by a gentleman, who told the house, that he had a very high veneration for that fabric, that he looked upon it as a noble piece of antiquity; that he had the honour to have lived by it many years; and therefore humbly begged the house would continue the honour to him, for it would really make him unhappy to be deprived of it now. Counsellor Hungerford seconded the gentleman, and said, ’Twould be a thousand pities, but he should be indulged to live still by his gate, for he was sure he could never live by his style. 413. A nobleman having presented King Charles II. with a fine horse, his majesty bade Killigrew, who was present, tell him his age; whereupon Killigrew went and examined the tail; What are you doing? said the king, that is not the place to find out his age. O! sir, said Killigrew, Your majesty knows one should never look a gift horse in the mouth. 414. A certain poetaster, whose head was full of a play of his own writing, was explaining the plot and design of it to a courtier. The scene of it, said he, is in Cappadocia; and, to judge rightly of the play, a man must transport himself into the country, and get acquainted with the genius of the people. You say right, answered the courtier, and I think it would be best to have it acted there. 415. A young man, who was a very great talker, making a bargain with Isocrates to be taught by him, Isocrates asked double the price that his other scholars gave him; and the reason, said he, is, that I must teach thee two sciences, one to speak, and the other to hold thy tongue.