Growing weary of their inexhaustible theme—of waiting for the emergence
of some sign of consciousness of the passing moment, a dropping of
references backwards or forwards, that would leave them in league
together, there as individuals—she pressed them for personal impressions
of the adventure in its own right, the movement into strangeness, the
being off the chain of accustomed things. They grew vague, lost interest
and fell presently into a silence from which she pulled them by an
enquiry about the plait.
In the midst of the story of the plait and just as some people were
being pointed out who still thought them three sisters, two with their
hair up, and one with a plait who did not appear at dinner, came a
longing to escape, the sense of a rendez-vous being missed, with the
scene and the time of day. But her preparations for flight were stayed
by their payment for her interest in the plait. They plied her with
questions; presently they were offering to lend her skating-boots, and
choosing from amongst the guests at their hotel, people she would like.
They were pitying her, thinking that she must be having a poor time and
determined at once that she should do more than just stand upon the
edge, sunning herself in the glow of the life they were finding so
entrancing.
But her contemplation of the desert that must be, from their point of
view, the life of a woman obviously poor and apparently isolated, took
her for a moment far away, and when she returned the link between them
was snapped. Her silence had embarrassed their habit of rapid give and
take. Making vague promises, she took leave, rescued by their immediate
reversion to the forms of speech set for such occasions, from holding
forth upon the subject of the dead level of happiness existing all over
the world independent of circumstances. They would have thought her both
pious and insane.
* * * * *
All the afternoon they had been in harmony, strolling and standing about
together in the snow until there seemed nothing more to say; and after
each run there had been something more to say. Till Italy lost all
strangeness but its beauty and he had seemed a simpler Michael free from
Michael’s certainty that everyone in the world was marching to
annihilation. It was the discovery of a shared sense of life at first
hand that had made them not fear saying the very small things.
And suddenly there was a wall, dividing. No more communication possible;
the mountains grown small and bleak and sad and even now, in being alone
upon the promontory there was no peace, in all the wide prospect no
beauty.
Why was it so much a matter of life and death, for men as for women? Why
did each always gather all its forces for the conflict?
If all he said were a part of the light by which he lived he should have
been able to remain calm. But he had not remained calm. He had been
first uneasy, then angry, and then sorry for the destruction of their
friendship.