The mill of silence — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
The mill of silence
John Stuart Mill · en
I looked about me in agony. Before and around was one huge sea of
faces, from the level of which rose a jangling patter of talk and
cries, like bubbles bursting on the surface of a seething tank of
corruption. And under the grim shadow of Newgate there stood, in full
view, a hideous machine. Barriers were about it, and a spruce cordon
of officials, who stood out humanly in that garden of squalid refuse.
It was black, with a black crossbeam; and from the beam a loop hung
motionless, like a collar for death to grin through, and the crowd
were already betting on the expression of his face when he should
first see it.
I do not know how long or short a time my anguish lasted. It may have
been half an hour, when the deep tolling of a bell wrought sudden
silence in the fetid air. At its first stroke the roar of voices went
off and lessened, rolling like a peal of thunder; at its third the
quiet of eternity had fallen and consumed the world.
A mist came before my eyes. When it cleared I was aware of a little
group on the platform, and one, with a ghastly white face, the center
of it.
“Who is it?” I whispered, in intolerable agony.
“Curse you!” growled my next neighbor. “Can’t you hold your tongue and
let a cove look?”
A word marred the full relish of his appetite.
I managed to slew my head away from the direct line of vision. A low
babble of voices came from the scaffold. He must be reprieved, I
thought, with a leap of the heart. I could not conceive voices
sounding natural, otherwise, under such fearful circumstances.
Suddenly, as I was on the point of looking once more to ease my
horrible tension of mind, there dropped upon my ears a low rumbling
flap, and immediately a hoarse murmur went up from the multitude.
Then, giving a cry myself, I turned my face. The rope hung down in a
straight line, but loop and man were gone.
From the universal murmur, by claps and starts, the old uproar bubbled
forth from the faces, till the pent-up street resounded with it. An
after-dinner loquacity was on all and the fellow who had cursed me a
minute ago addressed me now with over-brimming geniality of
information.
“Who’s him, says you? Why, where’s your wits gone, matey? Him was
Mul-ler, the greasy furriner as murdered old Briggs.”
The trial had made sensation enough of late, but the date of the poor
wretch’s execution I had had no thought of.
When at last I could force a passage through the press--for they
lingered like ghouls over the crumbs of the banquet--I broke into
Holborn, with my whole soul panting and crying for fresh air and
forgetfulness. It was hideous, it was inhuman, it was debasing, I
cried to myself, to launch that quivering mass of terror into eternity
in a public shambles! To such as came to see, it must be grossly
demoralizing; to those who, like me, were enforced spectators, it was
a sickening experience that must leave an impression of morbidity
almost indelible.