APPENDIX THE PHEASANTS REVOLT They did this in several reigns under such memorable leaders as Black Kat, Straw Hat, John Bull and What Tyler I. Objects: (_a_) to obtain a free pardon for having revolted. (_b_) to find out which was the gentleman when Adam delved and Eve span. (The answer was, of course, Adam, but the mystics of the Church had concealed this dangerous knowledge.) (_c_) to find out who was King and which of them was the Leader of the Rebellion. (_d_) to abolish the Villein. The Pheasants’ Revolts were therefore purely educational movements and were thus easily suppressed. II. How Quelled: (_a_) the Pheasants were met at Smithfield by the King who (_b_) riding forward alone on a white horse answered object (_c_) by announcing (I) “I am your King,” and (II) “I will be your leader.” (_c_) the real leader was then slain quickly by one of the Barons. (_d_) a free pardon was granted to the Pheasants [see object (_a_)]. (_e_) all were then put to death on the ground that they were Villeins [see object (_d_)]. These Revolts were thus clearly romantic episodes, and a Good Thing, and the clergy were enabled to prevent the pheasants finding out the answer to object (_b_). CHAPTER XXVI HENRY IV. A SPLIT KING When Henry IV Part I came to the throne the Barons immediately flung their gloves on the floor in order to prove 1. That Richard II was not yet dead 2. That Henry had murdered him. Henry very gallantly replied to this challenge by exhibiting Richard II’s head in St. Paul’s Cathedral, thus proving that he was innocent. Finding, however, that he was not memorable, he very patriotically abdicated in favour of Henry IV, Part II. RENEWED EDUCATIONAL FERMENT Even Henry IV Part II, however, is only memorable for having passed some interesting laws against his _Old Retainers_, i.e. butlers and sutlers, who had irritated him by demanding _Liveries_, requiring too much _Maintenance_, etc. He also captured the Scottish Prince James and, while keeping him as a sausage, had him carefully educated for nineteen years; finding, however, that James was still Scotch, Henry IV Part II lost interest in education and died. CHAPTER XXVII HENRY V. AN IDEAL KING [Illustration] On the death of Henry IV Part II, his son, Prince Hal, who had won all English hearts by his youthful pranks--(such as trying on the crown while his father lay dying, and hitting a very old man called Judge Gascoigne)--determined to justify public expectation by becoming the _Ideal English King_. He therefore decided on an immediate appearance in the Hundred Years War, making a declaration that all the treaties with France were to be regarded as dull and void.