1851; Or, The adventures of Mr. and Mrs. Sandboys and family, who came up to London to enjoy themselves, and to see the Great Exhibition.Mayhew, Henry
General
1851; Or, The adventures of Mr. and Mrs. Sandboys and family, who came up to London to enjoy themselves, and to see the Great Exhibition.
Mayhew, Henry
Great Exhibition (1851 : London, England) -- Fiction; London (England) -- Fiction
“It’s what is called the Toothache Racket, and far from uncommon. Two
men, you see, one of whom is provided with two small paper packets of
salt exactly alike, go into the parlour of a tavern which they know
countrymen are in the habit of using. The one with the salt, who enters
some few minutes after the other, pretends to be suffering greatly from
the toothache. The company, observing him to be apparently in extreme
pain, begin to recommend different cures for the complaint. One advises
him to rub the gum with brandy—another advocates the holding of a little
cold water in the mouth—a third has never known the oil of tobacco to
fail, and so on. The sufferer, however, is much obliged to them all, but
declares that nothing gives himself relief but a little salt, in a paper
similar to what he is then applying to his cheek.”
“The wicked hyp’crite!” involuntarily exclaimed the simple-minded
Cursty.
“Shortly after this he quits the room, leaving his paper on the table.
During his absence his “jolly,” that is, his accomplice, who, as I said,
came in a little while before the other, begins to laugh at the idea of
some salt, held outside the face, doing any good to the toothache, and
says, of course, it’s all the man’s imagination. He then proposes to
have a bit of fun with the absent invalid, and proceeds to empty all the
salt out of the paper on the table, and fill its place with sawdust.”
“What’s he gangin’ to be at,” interrupted Mr. Sandboys, deeply
interested in the tale.
“In a few minutes the gentleman with the toothache returns, almost
raving, and he pretends that the cold air has increased his pain to an
intolerable degree. He makes a rush to the paper that he had left
behind, and no sooner applies it to his cheek than he declares the salt
gives him instantaneous relief; whereupon the whole room begin to
titter, and the jolly, or accomplice, as I told you, is well nigh dying
with laughter as he informs the simpleton it’s nothing but fancy that’s
curing him, and that there’s no salt at all in the paper. But ‘the
simpleton’ declares he knows far better, for he filled it himself out of
the salt-cellar just before he quitted home. The jolly then offers to
wager him a sovereign that there’s not so much as a pinch in it, but the
gentleman with the toothache is so certain about the matter, that he
says it will only be robbing a man to take a bet on such a subject.”
“The rwogue’s gettin’ honest aw of a sudden,” cried Mr. S., with a
chuckle.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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