_Jane._ Well, if you won't remove this dreadful ban, I'll die as picturesquely as I can! In three well-known travesties, Henry VIII. plays the most conspicuous part--in William Brough's "Field of the Cloth of Gold" (1868, Strand), in Mr. Burnand's "Windsor Castle" (Strand, 1865), and Mr. Conway Edwardes' "Anne Boleyn" (Royalty, 1872). I name these in the order in which they deal with historical events. In "The Field of the Cloth of Gold" Katherine of Arragon is Queen, with Anne Boleyn (Miss F. Hughes) as maid of honour and (as Her Majesty suspects) a rival. To this suspicion Anne makes reference in the following lines:-- Queen Katherine! her I'm quite afraid of; She vows it isn't _honour_ that I'm _maid_ of; Declares King Henry loves me--as for me, I am no better than I ought to be; Such language she employs, I'm grieved to state Queen _Kate_ gets daily more _in-daily-Kate_. If I remonstrate, or to her appeal, Katherine goes off like a Katherine wheel. In "Windsor Castle" the King is in love, more or less, with Anne (Mr. Thomas Thorne), but inclined to let his vagrant fancy wander after Mabel Lynwood (Miss Ada Swanborough), who turns out to be Anne's sister. Anne, it is recorded, sang like a siren, and was especially addicted to a few French ditties. Of these Mr. Burnand makes her sing a diverting parody, printed, in "the book of the play," in French "as she is pronounced." The song is called CHARNSUNNETTE D'ANNE BOLEYN, _Arngtitulay_ "LER SHEVALIAY AY SAR BELLAY." I. Le Sh'valiay ay sar Bellay, Ker deetial Sir Grong Mossoo lar? Avec lespree der Jernessay "Commongvoo portayvoo?" Parley voo frarngsay? Parley voo--Tra-la-la-la-la-la. (_Refrang_). Parley voo, etc. "O Sh'valiay," dit sar Bellay, "Cumbeang ler caffy newaur lar?" "Ay p'tee tas o der veeay?" Toot sweet o reservoir. Jenner comprong par Jenner com--Tra-la-la-la-la. (_Refrang_). Jenner com, etc. _Morale._ Kong Johnteyomme L'Onglay say Daymarnd lay pomme de tare lar Partong poor lar Syreeay Ay Veve lar Lester Square! Charnsong ay finny O sey ay finny mong tra-la-la-la. In "Anne Boleyn," again, Anne (E. Danvers) is at last Queen, but with her life embittered by King Henry's flirtations with Jane Seymour (Miss Harriet Coveney). Thus, in one place, Anne exclaims:--