A call : $b The tale of two passionsFord, Ford Madox
General
A call : $b The tale of two passions
Ford, Ford Madox
English fiction -- 20th century
“Jervis? Saunders?” he said. “Yes, I suppose they do. I _hope_
they do, for we’re their life’s work, and if they take the interest
in us that I presume they do, they ought to talk about us. I imagine
Jervis discusses me now and then with his wife. I should think he does
it affectionately, on the whole. I don’t know.... It’s one of the few
things that are as mysterious as life and death. There are these people
always about us--all day, all night. They’ve got eyes--I suppose they
use them. But we’ve got no means of knowing what they think or what
they know. I do know a lot--about other people. Jervis gives me the
news while he’s shaving me. So I suppose I know nearly all he knows
about other people. He knows I like to know, and it’s part of what he’s
paid for. But as for what he knows about me”--Grimshaw waved his hand
as if he were flicking cigarette-ash off his knee--“why, I know nothing
about that. We never can; we never shall. But we never can and we never
shall know what anyone in the world knows of us and thinks. You’ll
find, as you go on, that you’ll never really know all that Pauline
thinks of you--not quite all. I shall never really know all that you
think about me. I suppose we’re as intimate as men can be in this
world, aren’t we? Well! You’re probably at this very moment thinking
something or other about me. Perhaps I’m boring you or irritating you,
but you won’t tell me. And,” he added, fixing his eyes gently and
amiably upon Dudley Leicester’s face, “you’ll never know all I know
about you.”
Dudley Leicester had become filled with an impetuous dread that he had
“given himself away” by his questions.
“Why I asked,” he said, and his eyes avoided Grimshaw’s glance, “is
that the postman seems to have been talking to Saunders about Pauline.”
Grimshaw started suddenly forward in his seat.
“Oh,” Dudley Leicester said, “it’s only that I asked Saunders about a
voice I had heard, and he said it was the postman asking when Pauline
would be home, or how her mother was. Something of that soft. It seems
rather impertinent of these chaps.”
“It seems to me rather nice,” Grimshaw said, “if you look at it without
prejudice. We may as well suppose that both Saunders and the postman
are decent fellows, and Pauline is so noticeable and so nice that it’s
only natural that an old servant and an old postman should be concerned
if she’s upset. After all, you know we do live in a village, and if we
don’t do any harm, I don’t see why we should take it for granted that
these people crab us. You’ve got to be talked about, old man, simply
because you’re there. Everyone is talked about--all of us.”
Dudley Leicester said, with a sudden and hot gloom:
“There’s nothing about me to talk about. I’ve never wanted to be an
interesting chap, and I never have been. I shall give Saunders the sack
and report the postman.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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