"Let a Person be never so far gone, I advise him not to despair; even though he has been troubled many Years with restless Reflections, which by long Neglect have hardened into settled Consideration. Those that have been stung with Satyr may here find a certain Antidote, which infallibly disperses all the Remains of Poison that has been left in the Understanding by bad Cures. It fortifies the Heart against the Rancour of Pamphlets, the Inveteracy of Epigrams, and the Mortification of Lampoons; as has been often experienced by several Persons of both Sexes, during the Seasons of _Tunbridge_ and the _Bath_. "I could, as farther Instances of my Success, produce Certificates and Testimonials from the Favourites and Ghostly Fathers of the most eminent Princes of _Europe_; but shall content myself with the Mention of a few Cures, which I have performed by this my _Grand Universal Restorative_, during the Practice of one Month only since I came to this City." _Cures in the Month of February_, 1713. "_GEORGE SPONDEE_, Esq; Poet, and Inmate of the Parish of St. _Paul's Covent-Garden_, fell into violent Fits of the Spleen upon a thin Third Night. He had been frighted into a Vertigo by the Sound of Cat-calls on the First Day; and the frequent Hissings on the Second made him unable to endure the bare Pronunciation of the Letter S. I searched into the Causes of his Distemper; and by the Prescription of a Dose of my _Obsequium_, prepared _Secundum Artem_, recovered him to his Natural State of Madness. I cast in at proper Intervals the Words, _Ill Taste of the Town_, _Envy of Criticks_, _bad Performance of the Actors_, and the like. He is so perfectly cured that he has promised to bring another Play upon the Stage next Winter. "A Lady of professed Virtue, of the Parish of St. _James's Westminster_, who hath desired her Name may be concealed, having taken Offence at a Phrase of double Meaning in Conversation, undiscovered by any other in the Company, suddenly fell into a cold Fit of Modesty. Upon a right Application of Praise of her Virtue, I threw the Lady into an agreeable waking Dream, settled the Fermentation of her Blood into a warm Charity, so as to make her look with Patience on the very Gentleman that offended. "_HILARIA_, of the Parish of St. _Giles's in the Fields_, a Coquet of long Practice, was by the Reprimand of an old Maiden reduced to look grave in Company, and deny her self the Play of the Fan. In short, she was brought to such Melancholy Circumstances, that she would sometimes unawares fall into Devotion at Church. I advis'd her to take a few _innocent Freedoms with occasional Kisses_, prescribed her the _Exercise of the Eyes_, and immediately raised her to her former State of Life. She on a sudden recovered her Dimples, furled her Fan, threw round her Glances, and for these two _Sundays_ last past has not once been seen in an attentive Posture. This the Church-Wardens are ready to attest upon Oath.