"Oh, then I doubt it. I'm not at all brave as he was. You ought to know
that."
"You have the courage that a veteran general most values in a soldier.
You might be half dead from terror, but you wouldn't run away.
Besides," I added, smiling, "you would not be afraid of shot and shell,
only the noise of a battle. In this respect your brother, no doubt,
differed from you. In the grand consciousness of right, and in his
faithful performance of duty, I believe his face was as serene as the
aspect of Mr. Yocomb when he looked at the coming storm. As far as
peace is concerned, his heaven began on earth. I envy him."
"Mr. Morton, I thank you for these words about my brother," she said
very gently, and with a little pathetic quaver in her voice. "They have
given me a comforting association with that awful day. Oh, I thank God
for the thought. Remembering what Mrs. Yocomb said, it reconciles me to
it all, as I never thought I could be reconciled. If Herbert believed
that it was his duty to be there, it was best he should be there. How
strange it is that you should think of this first, and not I!"
"Will you pardon me if I take exception to one thing you say? I do not
think it follows that he ought to have been there simply because he
felt it right to be there."
"Why, Mr. Morton! ought one not to do right at any and every cost? That
seemed to me the very pith of Mrs. Yocomb's teaching, and I think she
made it clear that it's always best to do right."
"I think so too, most emphatically; but what is right, Miss Warren?"
"That's too large a question for me to answer in the abstract; but is
not the verdict of conscience right for each one of us?"
"I can't think so," I replied, with a shrug. "About every grotesque,
horrible act ever committed in this world has been sanctioned by
conscience. Delicate women have worn hair-cloth and walked barefooted
on cold pavements in midnight penance. The devil is scarcely more cruel
than the Church, for ages, taught that God was. It's true that Christ's
life was one of self-sacrifice; but was there any useless, mistaken
self-sacrifice in it? If God is anything like Mrs. Yocomb, nothing
could be more repugnant to him than blunders of this kind."
She looked at me with a startled face, and I saw that my words had
unsettled her mind.
"If conscience cannot guide, what can?" she faltered. "Is not
conscience God's voice within us?"
"No. Conscience may become God's worst enemy--that is, any God that I
could worship or even respect."
"Mr. Morton, you frighten me. How can I do right unless I follow my
conscience?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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