"Can it be that she was sorrowful in the meeting-house for my sake
only? I've had strong proof of her wonderful kindness of heart. Well,
God bless her anyway. I'll wait and watch till I know the truth. I
suppose I'm the worst heathen Mrs. Yocomb ever preached to, but I'm
going to secure Emily Warren's happiness at any cost. If she truly
loves this man, I'll go away and fight it out so sturdily that she need
not worry. That's what her sermon means for me. I'm not going to pump
up any religious sentiment. I don't feel any. It's like walking into a
bare room to have a turn with a thumb-screw; but Mrs. Yocomb has hedged
me up to just this course. Oh, the gentle, inexorable woman! Satan
himself might well tremble before her. There is but one that I fear
more, and that's the woman I love most. Gentle, tender-hearted as she
is, she is more inexorable than Mrs. Yocomb. It's a little strange, but
I doubt whether there is anything in the universe that so inspires a
man with awe as a thoroughly good, large-minded woman."
I could not sleep that afternoon, and at last I became so weary of the
conflict between my hope and fear that I was glad to hear Miss Warren
at the piano, playing softly some old English hymns. The day was
growing cool and shadowy, but I hoped that before it passed I might get
a chance to say something to her which would give a different aspect to
the concluding words of Mrs. Yocomb's sermon. I had determined no
longer to avoid her society, but rather to seek it, whenever I could in
the presence of others, and especially of her affianced. They had
returned from a long afternoon in the arbor, which I knew must occasion
Miss Warren some unpleasant thoughts, and the banker was sitting on the
piazza chatting with Adah.
I strolled into the parlor with as easy and natural a manner as I could
assume, and taking my old seat by the window, said quietly: "Please go
on playing, Miss Warren."
She turned on me one of her swift looks, which always gave me the
impression that she saw all that was in my mind. Her color rose a
little, but she continued playing for a time. Then with her right hand
evoking low, sweet chords, she asked, with a conciliatory smile:
"Have you been thinking over Mrs. Yocomb's words this afternoon?"
"Not all the time--no. Have you?"
"How could I all the time?"
"Oh, I think you can do anything under heaven you make up your mind to
do," I said, with a slight laugh. The look she gave now was a little
apprehensive, and I added hastily: "I've had one thought that I don't
mind telling you, for I think it may be a pleasant one, though it must
recall that which is painful. The thought occurred to me when Mrs.
Yocomb was speaking, and since, that your brother had perfect peace as
he stood in that line of battle."
She turned eagerly toward me, and tears rushed into her eyes.
"You may be right," she said, in a low, tremulous tone.
"Well, I feel sure I'm right. I know it, if he was anything like you."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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