American fiction -- 19th century; Artists -- Fiction
"Van, you are right. I am mortified with myself beyond measure,
and I am bitterly ashamed that my aunt, her own mother, should
have so grossly misjudged her. Sibley, no doubt, IS the occasion
of her trouble in part, for she seems fairly to writhe under the
false position in which he has placed her by leading every one to
associate her name with his; but I now believe that she loathes
and detests him more than you or I can. Certainly no woman could
speak of a man in harsher or more scathing terms than she spoke
of him to-night. Well, to sum up the whole miserable trough, by
taking her mother's view for granted, I made such a mess of it that
I doubt if she ever speaks civilly to either of us again."
"Why! was my name mentioned?" asked Van Berg, quickly.
"Yes, confound it all! When things are going wrong there is a
miserable fatality about them, and the worst always happens. She
asked me point-blank if you shared my estimate of her, and I suppose
got the impression you did."
"Well really, Stanton," said Van Berg, with some irritation, "I
think you must have been unfortunate in your language."
"Worse than unfortunate. The whole blunder is unpardonable.
Still, do me justice. I could not answer her question with a bold
lie. And what would have been its use? How could you explain your
bearing towards her at the supper table? Your manner would have
frozen Jezebel herself."
"I was an infernal fool," groaned Van Berg.
"It is due to us both that I should say I told her you had tried
to form a good opinion of her, and very reluctantly received the
view her mother suggested. I said, in effect, you wished to think
well of her, although she had treated you so badly."
"Treated me badly! I have treated her a thousandfold worse. She,
at least, has never insulted me, and I can never forgive myself
for the insult I have offered her.
"Well, I hope to find her in the mood to accept an apology in the
morning," said Stanton.
"I'm in a confoundedly awkward position to apologize," growled
Van Berg. "Any reference to such an affair will be like another
insult;" and the friends parted in an unsatisfactory state of mind
towards each other, and especially towards themselves.
But that was a sad and memorable night to Ida Mayhew. She felt
that it might be her last on earth; for her dark purpose was rapidly
taking definite form.
she was passing into that unhealthful condition of mental excitement,
in which the salutary restraints of the physical nature lose their
power. In the place of drowsiness and weariness, she began to
experience an unnatural exaltation which would make any reckless
folly possible, if it took the guise of sublime and tragic action.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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