We had luncheon picnic fashion half-way to our journey's end, diverging
from the main road to find a secluded spot where we could spread our
cloth and open our hampers without fear of interruption or, to use a
more sinister word, detection. It was rather a jolly affair, that first
and last al fresco banquet of ours under the spreading branches of
mighty trees and beside the trickling waters of a gay little mountain
brook that hurried like mad down to the broad channel of the Danube,
now many miles away. The strain of the first few hours had slackened.
Success seemed assured. We had encountered no difficulties, no dangers
in town or country. No one appeared to be interested in us except
through idle curiosity; villagers and peasants stared at us and grinned;
policemen and soldiers stood aside to let us pass, or gave directions
politely when requested to do so. There were no signs of pursuit, no
indications of trouble ahead. And so we could afford to be gay and
confident at our midday meal in the hills bordering the broad highway.
We even went so far as to arrange for a jolly reunion in New York City
at no distant day! I remember distinctly that we were to dine at
Sherry's. To me, the day seemed a long way off.
I suppose, being a writer of fiction, I should be able to supply at
this point in the narrative, a series of thrilling, perhaps hair-raising
encounters with the enemy, in the form of spies, cut-throats, imperial
mercenaries or whatever came handiest to the imagination. It would be
a very simple matter to transform this veracious history into the most
lurid of melodramas by the introduction of the false and bizarre, but
it is not my purpose to do so. I mean to adhere strictly to the truth
and stand by the consequences. Were I inclined to sensationalism it
would be no trouble at all for me to have Tarnowsy's agents shooting
at our tires or gasoline tank from every crag and cranny; or to have
Rosemary kidnapped by aeroplanists supplied with drag-hooks; or to
have the Countess lodged in a village prison from which I should be
obliged to liberate her with battle-axe and six-shooter, my compensation
being a joyous rest in a hospital with the fair Aline nursing me back
to health and strength and cooing fond words in my rapacious ear the
while I reflected on the noble endowments of a nature that heretofore
had been commonplace and meek. But, no! None of these things happened
and I decline to perjure myself for the privilege of getting into the
list of "six best sellers."
So far as I am able to judge, there was absolutely no heroism displayed
during our flight through the hills and valleys, unless you are willing
to accept as such a single dash of sixty miles an hour which Britton
made in order to avoid a rain-shower that threatened to flank us if
we observed the speed laws.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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