A House Divided Against Itself (Complete) — John Shaqi
A House Divided Against Itself (Complete)Oliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
General
A House Divided Against Itself (Complete)
Oliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
Fiction
Frances was not apt to be depressed, but for the moment she felt lonely
and dull, and a great sense of monotony took hold upon her. It was like
this every night; it would be like this, so far as she knew, every night
to come, until perhaps she grew old, like Tasie, without becoming aware
that she had ceased to be a girl. It was not a cheering prospect. And
when there is any darkness or mystery surrounding one’s life, these are
just the circumstances to quicken curiosity, and turn it into something
graver, into an anxious desire to know. Frances did not know positively
that there was a mystery. She had no reason to think there was, she said
to herself. Her father preferred to live easily on the Riviera, instead
of living in a way that would trouble him at home. Perhaps the gentleman
they had met was a bore, and that was why Mr Waring avoided all mention
of him. He frequently thought people were bores, with whom Frances was
very well satisfied. Why should she think any more of it? Oh, how she
wished she had the courage to ask plainly and boldly, Who are we? Where
do we come from? Have we any friends? But she had not the courage. She
looked towards him, and trembled, imagining within herself what would be
the consequence if she interrupted his reading, plucked him out of the
quietude of the hour and of his book, and demanded an explanation--when
very likely there was no explanation! when, in all probability,
everything was quite simple, if she only knew.
The evening passed as evenings generally did pass in the Palazzo. Mr
Waring talked a little at dinner quite pleasantly, and smoked a
cigarette in the loggia afterwards in great good-humour, telling Frances
various little stories of people he had known. This was a sign of high
satisfaction on his part, and very agreeable to her, and no doubt he was
entirely unaware of the perplexity in her mind and the questions she was
so desirous of asking. The air was peculiarly soft that evening, and he
sat in the loggia till the young moon set, with an overcoat on his
shoulders and a rug on his knees, sometimes talking, sometimes
silent--in either way a very agreeable companion. Frances had never
been cooped up in streets, or exposed to the chill of an English spring;
so she had not that keen sense of contrast which doubles the enjoyment
of a heavenly evening in such a heavenly locality. It was all quite
natural, common, and everyday to her; but no one could be indifferent to
the sheen of the young moon, to the soft circling of the darkness, and
the reflections on the sea. It was all very lovely, and yet there was
something wanting. What was wanting? She thought it was knowledge,
acquaintance with her own position, and relief from this strange
bewildering sensation of being cut off from the race altogether, which
had risen within her mind so quickly and with so little cause.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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