This was a great Eye-sore and Heart-burning to some Lubberly Abbots who loung'd about the Court; they took it in great Dudgeon they were not Invited, and stuck so close to his Skirts, that they never rested 'till they Outed him. They told the King, who was naturally very Hasty, that Sir _John_ made-away with his Wine, and feasted his Paramours at his Expence; and not only so, but that they were forming a Design against his Life, which they in Conscience ought to discover: That Sir _John_ was not only an Heretic, but an Heathen; nay worse, they fear'd he was a Witch, and that he had bewitcht His Majesty into that unaccountable Fondness for a _Pudding-Maker_. They assur'd the King, That on a _Sunday_ Morning, instead of being at Mattins, he and his Trigrimates got together Hum-jum, all snug, and perform'd many Hellish and Diabolical Ceremonies. In short, they made the King believe that the Moon was made of Green-Cheese: And to shew how the Innocent may be Bely'd, and the best Intentions misrepresented, they told the King, That He and his Associates offer'd Sacrifices to _Ceres_: When, alas, it was only the Dumplings they eat. The Butter which was melted and pour'd over them, these vile Miscreants call'd _Libations_: And the friendly Compotations of our Dumpling-eaters, were call'd _Bacchanalian Rites_. Two or three among 'em being sweet-tooth'd, wou'd strew a little Sugar over their Dumplings; this was represented as an _Heathenish Offering_. In short, not one Action of theirs, but what these Rascally Abbots made Criminal, and never let the King alone 'till poor Sir _John_ was Discarded. Not but the King did it with the greatest Reluctance; but they had made it a Religious Concern, and he cou'd not get off on't. But mark the Consequence: The King never enjoy'd himself after, nor was it long before he was poison'd by a Monk at _Swineshead_ Abbey. Then too late he saw his Error; then he lamented the Loss of Sir _John_; and in his latest Moments wou'd cry out, Oh! that I had never parted from my dear _Jack Pudding_! Wou'd I had never left off Pudding and Dumpling! I then had never been thus basely Poison'd! never thus treacherously sent out of the World!----Thus did this good King lament: But, alas, to no Purpose, the Priest had given him his Bane, and Complaints were ineffectual.