When Admiral Foote was appointed to command the South Atlantic squadron, he bade Welles to see that the Admiral’s ship was quite sea-worthy. “How is it you are so particular,” said the Naval Chief. “Why,” said Lincoln, with a chuckle, “have I not placed my _Foot_ in it.” _Lincoln to Ewell_, ON HIS NOT FORCING HILL TO CROSS THE POTOMAC. “Dear Ewell,” wrote Lincoln, one day in a pet, “Your tactics have ended in loss; You have let Hill escape, I will venture to bet, It’s _myself_ and not him you made _cross_. Why were you so blinded by Hill’s little _ruse_? It is shameful--nay, more; it is cruel; Your failures, disasters, really give one the blues, And I wish I could only make _you Hill_” (you ill). _Shakspearian Query._ Abraham is known to be very fond of Shakspeare, yet at times, to indulge in a joke, even at the expense of his favourite. A short time since, he wrote as follows to a popular actor, with whom he is known to be on intimate terms:-- “In _Hamlet_, Act II., Scene 2, is this:-- “‘_King._ He tells me, my dear Gertrude, he hath found the head and source of all your son’s distemper.’ “‘_Queen._ I doubt it is no other but the _main_.’ “Tell me, does her Majesty imply that _Hamlet_ suffered from sea-sickness?” The reply was that the actor believed that it was not the _main_ cause. _Running Comment._ On hearing that an American composer was engaged in writing a national hymn----, the President hinted that “He hoped that it would not have too many _runs_ in it.” _An Impossibility._ “The Americans,” said Chase, “at the present crisis, must not be extravagant--they must live _under_ their incomes.” “How can they do that,” said the President, “when there is no alternative but their living _on_ them.” _Jack’s Opinion._ The President narrates the following story:--“While passing along the streets of New York, one day, I met a Jack Tar. ‘What ship,’ I enquired, ‘do you belong to?’ ‘What odds is that to you,’ was the reply. ‘Do you know who I am,’ I exclaimed. ‘No.’ ‘Why, I am the President.’ Then, said Jack, ‘_You have a damned good berth of it!_’” _The House of Congress._ “That house,” said Abe, “is a swan house--all white and fair outside, but only think of the black-legs that are working out of sight.” [This, if ever said by the President, is an adaptation from Douglas Jerrold.] _Abe Lincoln’s opinion of a man’s strength._ Upon the receipt of the news that ---- had carried Fort Nagher--the President drily remarked that “He must be a very _strong man_!” _The Fall of Pride._ An enthusiastic Englishman once said to the President, that the Niagara river was the pride of rivers. “Yes,” was the reply, “but that pride has a tremendous fall.” _The Captain’s Reply._