Each knew that the other was not satisfied at all, each knew the cause
of that silent dissatisfaction with what life had to give.
"I am satisfied," said the man grimly.
It was the tone that said, "I will be satisfied in spite of fate! In
spite of my own actions, my own sin, my own remorse, I will be
satisfied!"
"You have changed your note," said Florence, regarding him curiously.
"And not too soon," he answered decisively. "There is nothing so useless
as sorrowing over the past and regretting what cannot be undone. Let me
recommend my philosophy of life to you. Make the best of what remains;
we cannot bring back what we have cast away." There was a new hardness
in his tone--not of recklessness, but of unflinching determination. He
rose and stood on the hearthrug, with his hands behind him as he spoke.
"I have taken a new departure. I have wasted many hours of the past. I
am resolved to waste not one hour in future. 'Though much is taken, much
remains,' as the poet says; and you and I, Florence, have all to look
for in the future and nothing in the past."
"That is true," she said, in a very low tone. "Nothing in the past!"
Then she sat up, as if stirred to movement by his attitude, and looked
at him again. "What has caused this change of mind, Hubert? Have you
fallen in love?"
He uttered a short laugh.
"Not I--I don't know the sensation."
"You knew it a few years ago, when I thought you would marry pretty Mary
Marsden."
"She married a Jew money-lender," said Hubert drily. "I saw her the
other day--she weighs fourteen stone, I should think!"
"Poor little Mary! It is not love then?"
"No, it is not." He was silent a minute or two, pulling his moustache
with a quick nervous movement which betrayed some agitation of mind.
Then he said quickly, "I had better tell you something and get it over,
though I have no wish to rake up the memory of unpleasant subjects. I
heard a few months ago that the man Westwood was dead."
"Dead? At Portland?"
"Yes. An accident on the works where he was engaged. He died after a few
hours' unconsciousness."
Florence meditated for a few moments and then said softly--
"I think that I now understand."
"It will be better that we do not speak of the matter again," said
Hubert, in the masterful way which she was beginning to recognise as one
of his characteristics. "It is all over and done with; nothing we can
say or do will make any difference. The man is gone, and we are here. We
can begin a new life if we choose."
His sister watched him with eyes which expressed a greater gloom than he
was able to understand. Her hands began to tremble as he said the last
few words.
"You can--you can!" she cried, almost with vehemence. "But for me--there
is no new life for me!"--and covering her face with her hands, she began
to weep, not violently, but so that he saw the tears oozing from between
her slender fingers.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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