Now Dr. Porpoise put a plaster on the little oyster's chest and a
blister at her feet. He bade her eat nothing but a tiny bit of sea-foam
on toast twice a day. Every two hours she was to take a spoonful of
cod-liver oil, and before each meal a wineglassful of the essence of
distilled cuttlefish. The plaster she didn't mind, but the blister and
the cod-liver oil were terrible; and when it came to the essence of
distilled cuttlefish--well, she just couldn't stand it! In vain her
mother reasoned with her, and promised her a new doll and a
skipping-rope and a lot of other nice things: the little oyster would
have none of the horrid drug; until at last her father, abandoning his
dignity in order to maintain his authority, had to hold her down by main
strength and pour the medicine into her mouth. This was, as you will
allow, quite dreadful.
But this treatment did the little oyster no good; and her parents made
up their minds that they would send for another doctor, and one of a
different school. Fortunately they were in a position to indulge in
almost any expense, since the father-oyster himself was president of one
of the largest banks of Newfoundland. So Dr. Sculpin came with his neat
little medicine-box under his arm. And when he had looked at the sick
little oyster's tongue, and had taken her temperature, and had felt her
pulse, he said he knew what ailed her; but he did not tell anybody what
it was. He threw away the plasters, the blisters, the cod-liver oil, and
the essence of distilled cuttlefish, and said it was a wonder that the
poor child had lived through it all!
"Will you please bring me two tumblerfuls of water?" he remarked to the
mother-oyster.
The mother-oyster scuttled away, and soon returned with two conch-shells
filled to the brim with pure, clear sea-water. Dr. Sculpin counted three
grains of white sand into one shell, and three grains of yellow sand
into the other shell, with great care.
"Now," said he to the mother-oyster, "I have numbered these 1 and 2.
First, you are to give the patient ten drops out of No. 2, and in an
hour after that, eight drops out of No. 1; the next hour, eight drops
out of No. 2; and the next, or fourth, hour, ten drops out of No. 1. And
so you are to continue hour by hour, until either the medicine or the
child gives out."
"Tell me, doctor," asked the mother, "shall she continue the food
suggested by Dr. Porpoise?"
"What food did he recommend?" inquired Dr. Sculpin.
"Sea-foam on toast," answered the mother.
Dr. Sculpin smiled a smile which seemed to suggest that Dr. Porpoise's
ignorance was really quite annoying.
"My dear madam," said Dr. Sculpin, "the diet suggested by that quack,
Porpoise, passed out of the books years ago. Give the child toast on
sea-foam, if you wish to build up her debilitated forces."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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