"Something's gone wrong with all of them," said Huber, eager to pour out his overburdened heart. "They act like they just don't want to work. Turning out plain junk on the assembly line. Even the Accuracy Control boys are letting down on the job, and they're supposed to be cracker-jacks! In fact, the only guys that are doing any kind of job are the Martians. I hired myself fifteen more today. But that's only gonna stir up _more_ fuss...." "I hate them," said Diana, sipping slowly and looking down into her glass moodily. "Ugly, slippery things. Ugh!" "What?" said Huber blankly. "Your Martian friends. Taking away good jobs from Earth people. Never buying anything. And those awful arms! If you ask me, we ought to send them right back where they--" "You don't know them!" he interrupted loudly. "They're nice, quiet folks. They work hard and they don't give you a hard time. They're ten times as efficient as some of the bums in--" "All right, all right! You don't have to shout at me." Diana stood up and gulped the rest of her drink down. Then she went over to the phonograph. "Are you going to play that song again?" asked Huber. "Do you mind?" she said sarcastically. "I happen to like it." Huber said something under his breath and returned to his paper. But when the record started, he put it down and just listened as the strange, haunting Martian melody filled the room. * * * * * BLINKER: Then the Martian says, "For Pete's sake! Why can't you clean up this filthy cave sometimes?" STRAIGHT MAN: So what did his wife say? BLINKER: So his wife says, "What do you expect? I've only got three hands!" (LAUGHTER) STRAIGHT MAN: Well, tell me, Blinker--what else did you do on your trip to Mars? Did you meet any--what's wrong? BLINKER: Nothing's wrong. Just don't step in front of the camera, that's all. STRAIGHT MAN: Hah, hah. Sorry, old man. Er--tell me, what else did you do on-- BLINKER: Now for Chrissakes, I told you to get out of the way! What're you trying to do? Hog the show? DIRECTOR: (OFF CAMERA) Psst! Blinker! What are you doing? We're on the air! BLINKER: I don't care if we're on the air ---- air! I won't be pushed around! STRAIGHT MAN: You won't, huh? Okay, you fat tub of lard! I've had enough of your-- DIRECTOR: Blinker! Adams! BLINKER: I'll punch that stupid face right into-- ANNOUNCER: Ladies and gentlemen, due to circumstances beyond our control, the Universal Broadcasting Company interrupts the Joe Blinker Comedy Hour to bring you a program of recorded mood music. Our first selection is a popular record on the Canal label, entitled _Melancholy_. * * * * * The chairman rapped his gavel for order. "One more demonstration like that, and we'll have to clear the room of spectators," he warned. "This inquiry is a serious matter, and we cannot permit levity. Now, Mr. Collins, go on with your testimony."