"We have two patients, dear Johanna," said Helena; "and I really believe
that my task as Carlo's nurse is harder than yours. Fancy the
self-control it costs me to conceal from poor Carlo the anguish of my
heart; to dress, to receive visits, to walk and drive, and to preside at
the little suppers to which Carlo has accustomed himself as well as his
friends. It is not enough to give artistic performances; the artist must
maintain his position in society; and, since Batti needs my aid in this,
I must not refuse it."
After talk of this kind she would kiss her 'poor little sick angel,'
embrace Johanna, call her her comfort and support, and then return to
her usual mode of life without a thought as to the amount of Johanna's
self-denial.
Johanna had no sense of exercising any, but the confinement and the bald
desolation of her surroundings added to her weight of misery. The room
to which Lisbeth had been removed was low-ceiled and scarcely ten paces
square, the walls were covered with a gaudy paper, the child's bed stood
at one end, with an old sofa, upon which Johanna slept; against one wall
stood a couple of common tables and chairs, and curtains of doubtful
cleanliness were hanging before the little window, which looked out upon
a narrow side-street. Helena declared that she herself could not exist
four-and-twenty hours in such a 'hole;' but it never occurred to her to
try to make it more comfortable. Why should she trouble herself? By
foolishly breaking off her engagement Johanna had relinquished all claim
to especial respect, and must be glad to find an asylum with her
quasi-step-father. Unfortunately, she was quite as haughty as formerly.
In vain did Helena try to discover the cause of her break with her
lover. "I cannot speak of it," Johanna always repeated; and then Batti
in his violent way would order his wife not to 'torment the poor
thing.' "I am glad," he would say, "that it has happened as it has; now
she will no longer refuse to accede to my plans. In a year she will be
the queen of my circus."
Johanna never suspected this. Batti begged her kindly to accept for the
present the shelter of his 'nomad-tent,' and she accepted gratefully
what was cordially offered. She scarcely thought of the future,--the
present, with its dull, paralyzing pain, so weighed upon her soul.
At last she was roused by a letter from Dönninghausen. Aunt Thekla had
addressed the envelope. It contained a communication from her
grandfather. Johanna kissed the handwriting, as she had so often kissed
the withered hand that had traced it, and then read the letter, feeling
as she did so the angry glance of his large eyes, and hearing the
muttered thunder of his voice. He wrote,--
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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