"The likeness is good enough, I must confess; but I detest those
sketchy productions which cannot possibly give any idea of womanly
attractions. Fortunately, however, M. de Morin has promised me a
portrait in oils, in which he will do his best to reproduce my smile
and the brightness of my eyes.
"You know, dearest, that I am not given to illusions, and that I know
exactly what value to place on myself. I am not what is called a
pretty woman, but I have in my expression, in my look, a certain
softness, a mellowness, in fact, such as the Spaniards term
_morbidez_. A Thouareg Chief said to me one day—but I will not
expatiate on these details. You know them, and we will keep them to
ourselves.
"At first, as you will have guessed, this expedition did not inspire
me with any great amount of confidence. The doctor did not want to
have anything to do with medicine, the literary man wanted to pry
into my private life, and the painter, instead of reserving his
pencils for African curiosities, sketched me in déshabille.
"Well, my dear, I was mistaken. These people are originals,
certainly, _fantaisistes_, as they call themselves; humourists, as we
in England should call them; but they are very nice, and in reality
very much in earnest. I think I shall get on with them, if they will
only keep from being jealous of each other about me. The fact is—why
should I try to hide it from you, the faithful depositary of all my
secrets?—the fact is, I am afraid that all of them will make love to
me.
"Already M. de Morin has bestowed on me some tender glances, whose
meaning there is no mistaking, and I shall need all my tact,
circumspection, and reserve, and plenty of the last. I have made up
my mind to favour no one of the three, and so I trust that the
expedition may pass over without any regular proposal.
"And, besides, I can rely upon Madame de Guéran for protection
against any annoyance. These three gentlemen, but especially the
painter and the literary man, are her slaves, body and soul. I
thought at first that they were in love with her; but as I now see
that they do not pay her a single compliment, but reserve all their
attentions and flirtations for me, I am obliged to come to an
opposite conclusion.
"And I am very glad to think that there is no chance of rivalry
between the Baroness and me, for it would be very painful to me to
wound in any way so thoroughly genial a woman. I am delighted to give
her her due, for she is a high-minded, good-natured creature. Neither
is she by any means deficient in firmness of character and resolute
courage—in fact, she reminds me very much of that dear Miss Tinne,
both as regards her beauty, her independence of character and her
love of adventure. But I shall feel very much safer with the Baroness
than I ever could with Alexina, who was a little too eccentric, poor
dear, and involved us in adventures which I, for one, do not care to
have repeated.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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