Mastery or control does not consist any more in the regulation by the man of any egoistic-social activities of the woman, the dictating of what she shall do or wear or think, nor in the acts of the man himself consciously designed to steer her this way or that. Mastery does consist in what the husband, and the husband alone, can make the wife feel. It does consist in the establishment and maintenance of a sense on her part of belonging to him, which he can develop even though granting her in the egoistic-social sphere, the most absurd license—the _Hörigkeit_ (mentioned by Freud) based on the peculiar intensity with which he gratified after awakening it in early married life, her erotic need. § 201 Possibly the great increase in the number of divorces is due to the increasing expectation of something unutterably fine in marriage and an inevitable disillusionment resulting from concrete experience. There would be no divorce on the grounds of adultery if the married woman felt that her paramour could give her no joy remotely resembling what her husband could. The adultery of the man, too, comes from disappointment. Where there is absolutely complete satisfaction the motive for adultery cannot exist. The man or woman with conscious and unconscious passion of the one developed into a habit may be attracted by other women but the other woman’s attractiveness will not be as great as his wife’s. And deflection in either husband or wife, if they think at all precisely on their action, must be quite repugnant to them in every way. The uncontrolled man who does not master his wife’s erotic emotions is disappointed in her and seeks his supreme gratification with another woman who appears to be able to give him what he thinks he cannot get from his wife in the way of appreciation, sympathy or understanding. If this is the man’s attitude then, of course, he cannot have grasped the idea of the higher monogamy, which is not that of getting but of giving. No man in any degree cognizant of the concept of true mating can fail to find even the woman to whom he happens to be married, able to receive if he practises properly the technique of presentation. He must have found certain qualities in her before he married her, which his awkwardness in presenting himself have perturbed, and he can now review these and work upon them until he is utterly accepted. For his presentation of himself and his service to her in the worship of Eros are the only means toward his adequately virile satisfaction. _Credite expertis._