Upon the whole, let me inform you, That all that could be said, _pro_ and _con_, on both Sides, being fairly heard, it was plain, That _Trim_, in every Part of this Affair, had behaved very ill;—and _one_ Thing, which was never expected to be known of him, happening in the Course of this Debate to come out against him; namely, That he had gone and told the Parson, before he had ever set Foot in his Parish, That _John_ his Parish-Clerk,—his Church-Wardens, and some of the Heads of the Parish, were a Parcel of Scoundrels.—Upon the Upshot, _Trim_ was kick’d out of Doors; and told, at his Peril, never to come there again. At first _Trim_ huff’d and bounced most terribly;—swore he would get a Warrant;—then nothing would serve him but he would call a Bye-Law, and tell the whole Parish how the Parson had misused him;—but cooling of that, as fearing the Parson might possibly bind him over to his good Behaviour, and, for aught he knew, might send him to the House of Correction,—he let the Parson alone; and, to revenge himself, falls foul upon his Clerk, who had no more to do in the Quarrel than you or I;—rips up the Promise of the old-cast-Pair-of-black-Plush-Breeches, and raises an Uproar in the Town about it, notwithstanding it had slept ten Years.—But all this, you must know, is look’d upon in no other Light, but as an artful Stroke of Generalship in _Trim_, to raise a Dust, and cover himself under the disgraceful Chastisement he has undergone. If your Curiosity is not yet satisfied,—I will now proceed to relate the _Battle_ of the Breeches, in the same exact Manner I have done _that_ of the Watch-Coat. Be it known then, that, about ten Years ago, when _John_ was appointed Parish-Clerk of this Church, this said Master _Trim_ took no small Pains to get into _John_’s good Graces in order, as it afterwards appeared, to coax a Promise out of him of a Pair of Breeches, which _John_ had then by him, of black Plush, not much the worse for wearing;—_Trim_ only begging for God’s Sake to have them bestowed upon him when _John_ should think fit to cast them. _Trim_ was one of those kind of Men who loved a Bit of Finery in his Heart, and would rather have a tatter’d Rag of a Better Body’s, than the best plain whole Thing his Wife could spin him. _John_, who was naturally unsuspicious, made no more Difficulty of promising the Breeches, than the Parson had done in promising the Great Coat; and, indeed, with something less Reserve,—because the Breeches were _John’s own_, and he could give them, without Wrong, to whom he thought fit.