A Preliminary Study of the Emotion of Love between the SexesBell, Sanford
Science
A Preliminary Study of the Emotion of Love between the Sexes
Bell, Sanford
Child psychology; Love
The routine of the school furnishes other opportunities that are
taken advantage of. Lovers will manage some way to sit or stand
together, and are thrilled by touching. One boy who sat behind his
sweetheart would place his arm along the back of the desk where she
would come in contact with it. Others carry on their courtship by
touching their feet under the desks, etc. It is common to see
favoritism in recitations wherein pupils make the corrections; the
lover seldom corrects the sweetheart, and _vice versa_. In contests
such as spelling, words are purposely misspelled in order to favor
the sweetheart or to keep from “turning her down.” The eye glance is
another means as efficacious with children as with adults. One pair
of young lovers, whose unsympathetic teacher forbade their looking at
each other, brought hand mirrors by means of which they continued to
exchange their “love messages.”
Few teachers complain of the love affairs of children in these first
two periods as interfering with school work,--except when one of the
lovers is absent. A score or more of the observers assert that during
the absence of one of the lovers, the other does not do as good work
and often becomes moody and irritable. On the other hand it very
materially quickens the efforts of many who want to appear well
before their lovers. One boy, nine years old, who had been quite lazy
and was looked upon as being rather dull, braced up and for two years
led his class, in order, as he said, “to win his Ottilia.” During the
adolescent stage that follows this the emotion becomes so intense and
all absorbing as to interfere very much with school work, or with
anything else that requires application.
Akin to the disturbance caused by the absence of the lover from
school is the grief that comes from being more or less permanently
separated, as by moving away or by the death of one. In some
instances the grief is very intense and protracted. Four cases of
attempts at suicide are reported: one boy eight years old; another
nine; a girl nine and another eleven. Six cases of nervous illness
are reported as due, either to separation or jilting. Ordinarily,
however, weaning is comparatively an easy matter.
Teasing breaks up many of these love affairs, and not infrequently
causes the lovers to hate each other; in which case they childishly
look upon each other as the cause instead of the occasion of the
torment. Also under the spur of the taunts of mates the lovers are
stimulated to say things to or about each other that lead to
estrangement. In some instances, however, the persecution is taken as
a sort of martyrdom and is enjoyed. Jealousy is another potent factor
in separating these young lovers. Teasing is not the primary cause of
the tendency to conceal the emotion.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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