He now reflected, with much compunction, that this was highly improper.
He ought to have asked about flower-shows, and inquired whether the
Princess of Wales was looking well of late. Some reference to the late
Parisian comedy might have introduced a disquisition on the new grays
and greens of the French milliners, with a passing mention made of the
price paid for a pair of ponies by a certain marquise unattached. He had
not spoken of one of these things; perhaps he could not if he had tried.
He remembered, with an awful consciousness of guilt, that he had
actually discoursed of woman suffrage, of the public conscience of New
York, of the extirpation of the Indians, and a dozen different things
not only taking no heed of any opinions that his audience of two might
hold, but insisting on their accepting his opinions as the expression of
absolute and incontrovertible truth.
He became more and more dissatisfied with himself. If he could only go
back now, he would be much more wary, more submissive and complaisant,
more anxious to please. What right had he to abuse the courtesy and
hospitality of those two strangers, and lecture them on the Constitution
of their own country? He was annoyed beyond expression that they had
listened to him with so much patience.
And yet he could not have seriously offended them for they had earnestly
besought him to dine with them on the following Tuesday evening to meet
an American judge; and when he had consented, Mrs. Lorraine had written
down on a card the date and hour, lest he should forget. He had the card
in his pocket; surely he could not have offended them? If he had pursued
this series of questions, he might have gone on to ask himself why he
should be so anxious not to have offended these two new friends. He was
not ordinarily very sensitive to the opinions that might be formed of
him--more especially by persons living out of his own sphere, with whom
he was not likely to associate. He did not, indeed, as a general rule,
suffer himself to be perturbed about anything; and yet, as he went along
the busy thoroughfare at this moment, he was conscious that rarely in
his life had he been so ill at ease.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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