After he had gone--carrying with him a short letter from me to my
father--and he was perforce obliged to leave me soon, for it would
not do to keep the servants waiting--I treasured the memory of those
last words of his in my heart, and thought of them many times when
feeling homesick or afraid of the troublous days to come. They
comforted me, too, when my menservants left me and went home with the
horses and litter, which seemed like burning my boats behind me.
I was received with kindness by Lady Jane's servants and others of
the household of the Duke of Northumberland, her father-in-law. For
he was the owner of the house, although he was allowing his son, Lord
Dudley, and Lady Jane to live there. Particularly Mistress Ellen,
Lady Jane's other gentlewoman, was good to me and welcomed me right
heartily as her fellow lady-in-waiting. Mistress Ellen was older
than I was, and much older than Lady Jane, who was a few months my
junior, which I was rather glad of at the time, thinking that then
thought, I need not be afraid of her.
Mistress Ellen would not allow me to see lady Jane that first night;
she said I was too tired and too much overcome by the vastness of the
house and its grandeur to appear at my best before her mistress.
'Sleep will restore your strength,' she said, 'and give you the quiet
confidence, which perhaps more than anything else betokens a true
gentlewoman, who knows what she is, although perhaps others do not at
the time. And I should like you to stand well, child,' she said
kindly, 'in the regard of Lady Jane, for she has few friends of her
own age, being so learned and bookish as to find little sympathy
amongst other girls--and, although she is married, she is but a girl,
poor young thing!' and she sighed.
Mistress Ellen, I should think, was thirty years old, and looked
older, because of her manner of dress, which was handsome but
exceedingly cumbrous, especially in regard to her coif, or bonnet,
which concealed a large portion of her face and head. She was very
kind to me, and when I cried that first night, being so weary and
thinking of my father and the boys so far away, and Sir Hubert gone,
too, for a while, she comforted me with loving words, saying I was to
take courage, for the future might have great things in store for me,
and the past was past and I should never again have that first
bitterness of homesickness to live through, as every day of my new
life would make it easier for me.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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