'CARISSIMA TERESA--I received your letter, which is delightful to me
because it is yours, and terrible to me because it scolds me, abuses
me, flies at me, makes me feel like a schoolboy who has had a scolding.
Yes; it is quite true. I cannot help it. She has bewitched me. She is a
lily made into a woman. I feared you would be angry, especially angry
because she is a foreigner; but the hour of fate has struck. You will
not wonder when you see her. She is as blonde as the dawn and as pure
as a pearl. It seems to me that I have never loved any woman at all in
my life before. To love her is like plunging one's hand in cool spring
water on a midsummer noon. She is such repose; such innocence; such
holiness! In the midst of this crowded, over-coloured, vulgar London
life--for it is very vulgar at its highest--she seems like some angel
of purity. I saw her first standing with a knot of roses in her hand
under a cedar tree, at one of their afternoon clubs on the river. She
was drinking a cup of tea; they are always drinking tea. And she is so
white. I never saw anything so white except the snow on the Leonessa.
She is not in the least like the fast young ladies of England, of whom
one sees so much in the winter at Rome. I do not like their fast young
women. If you want a woman who is fast, a Parisienne is best, or even
an American. Englishwomen overdo it. She is just like a primrose; like
a piece of porcelain; like a soft, pale star shining in the morning.
I write all kinds of poetry when I think of her. And then, there is
something _Sainte Nitouche_ about her which is delicious, because it is
so real. The only thing which was wanting in her was that she ought to
have been shut up in a convent, and I ought to have had to imperil my
soul for all eternity by getting her over a stone wall with a silken
ladder. But it is a prosaic age, and this is a very prosaic country.
London amuses me, but it is such a crowd, and it is frightfully ugly.
I cannot think how people who are so enormously rich as the English
can put up with such ugliness. The houses are all too small, even
the big ones. I have not seen a good ballroom; they say there are
good ones in the country houses. The clubs are admirable, but life in
general seems to me hurried, costly, ungraceful, very noisy, and almost
entirely consecrated to eating. It is made up of a scramble and a mass
of food. People engage themselves for dinners a month in advance.
Everybody's engagement book is so full that it is the burden of their
days. They accept everything, and, at the eleventh hour, pick out what
they prefer, and, to use their own language, "throw over" the rest.
I do not think it is pretty behaviour, but nobody seems to object to
it. I wonder that the women do not do so, but they seem to be afraid
of losing their men altogether if they exact good manners from them.
People here are not at all well-mannered, to my taste; neither the men
nor the women. They are brusque and negligent, and have few _petits
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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