British -- Italy -- Fiction; England -- Fiction; Florence (Italy) -- Fiction; Humorous stories; Young women -- Fiction
“Yes, indeed, and at the present moment homeless. I heard from them
last week—Miss Teresa and Miss Catharine Alan. I’m really not joking.
They are quite the right people. Mr. Beebe knows them, too. May I tell
them to write to you?”
“Indeed you may!” he cried. “Here we are with the difficulty solved
already. How delightful it is! Extra facilities—please tell them they
shall have extra facilities, for I shall have no agents’ fees. Oh, the
agents! The appalling people they have sent me! One woman, when I
wrote—a tactful letter, you know—asking her to explain her social
position to me, replied that she would pay the rent in advance. As if
one cares about that! And several references I took up were most
unsatisfactory—people swindlers, or not respectable. And oh, the
deceit! I have seen a good deal of the seamy side this last week. The
deceit of the most promising people. My dear Lucy, the deceit!”
She nodded.
“My advice,” put in Mrs. Honeychurch, “is to have nothing to do with
Lucy and her decayed gentlewomen at all. I know the type. Preserve me
from people who have seen better days, and bring heirlooms with them
that make the house smell stuffy. It’s a sad thing, but I’d far rather
let to some one who is going up in the world than to someone who has
come down.”
“I think I follow you,” said Sir Harry; “but it is, as you say, a very
sad thing.”
“The Misses Alan aren’t that!” cried Lucy.
“Yes, they are,” said Cecil. “I haven’t met them but I should say they
were a highly unsuitable addition to the neighbourhood.”
“Don’t listen to him, Sir Harry—he’s tiresome.”
“It’s I who am tiresome,” he replied. “I oughtn’t to come with my
troubles to young people. But really I am so worried, and Lady Otway
will only say that I cannot be too careful, which is quite true, but no
real help.”
“Then may I write to my Misses Alan?”
“Please!”
But his eye wavered when Mrs. Honeychurch exclaimed:
“Beware! They are certain to have canaries. Sir Harry, beware of
canaries: they spit the seed out through the bars of the cages and then
the mice come. Beware of women altogether. Only let to a man.”
“Really—” he murmured gallantly, though he saw the wisdom of her
remark.
“Men don’t gossip over tea-cups. If they get drunk, there’s an end of
them—they lie down comfortably and sleep it off. If they’re vulgar,
they somehow keep it to themselves. It doesn’t spread so. Give me a
man—of course, provided he’s clean.”
Sir Harry blushed. Neither he nor Cecil enjoyed these open compliments
to their sex. Even the exclusion of the dirty did not leave them much
distinction. He suggested that Mrs. Honeychurch, if she had time,
should descend from the carriage and inspect “Cissie” for herself. She
was delighted. Nature had intended her to be poor and to live in such a
house. Domestic arrangements always attracted her, especially when they
were on a small scale.
Cecil pulled Lucy back as she followed her mother.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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