England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; Mate selection -- Fiction
I do not know how long it was before she heard steps below, for her
senses were preternaturally quickened--and then the sound of the hall
door closed, and then the rain again, as if nothing had happened. What
had happened? Nothing, indeed, except that Mrs. Damerel herself had seen
the visitors, which was a great compliment to them, as she never left
her husband’s side. By and by her soft steps came back again,
approaching gradually up the stairs and the long corridor. The sound of
them fell upon Rose’s heart--was it all over then? ended forever? Then
her mother came in, calm and composed, and relieved her. She did not
even look at Rose, as if there were anything out of the ordinary in this
very simple proceeding. She told her husband quietly that she had said
good-by to young Wodehouse; that he was going early next morning; that
she was very sorry for his poor mother. “Yes, my dear; but if mothers
were always to be considered, sons would never do anything. Mayn’t I
have something to drink?” said the patient; and thus the subject was
dismissed at once and forever.
“Go and see if Mary has made some fresh lemonade,” said Mrs. Damerel.
Rose obeyed mechanically. The pulses were still beating so that her
blood seemed like the tide at sea beating upon a broad beach, echoing
hollow and wild in huge rolling waves. She went down-stairs like one in
a dream and got the lemonade and carried it back again, hearing her own
steps as she had heard her mother’s. When this piece of business was
over, and Rose found herself again in the little anteroom, all alone,
with nothing but the sound of the rain to fill up the silence, and the
great waves of sound in her ears beginning to die into moans and dreary
sobbing echoes, what can I say of her feelings? Was it possible that all
was over and ended--that she would never more see him again--that he was
gone without even a good-by? It was not only incredible to her, but it
was intolerable; must she bear it? She could not bear it; yet she must.
She stood at the window and looked out, and the bluish-gray world and
the falling rain looked in at Rose, and no other sound came to console
the aching in her heart. He was gone, and there was no hope that he
would come back; and she could not, dared not, go to him. The evening
went on while she sat in this train of excited feelings, wondering
whether the anguish in her heart would not call for an answer somehow,
and unable to believe that neither God nor man would interfere. When it
was dark she broke forth from all control, and left her post, as she
could not do when leaving it was of any use: but there is a point at
which the intolerable cannot be borne any longer. She put a blue
waterproof cloak on her, and went out into the rain and the dark; but
what was poor Rose to do, even when her pain became past bearing? She
strayed round the dark lawn, and looked, but in vain, for the lights of
the cottage at Ankermead; and then she ventured to the gate, and stood
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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