And yet all the different systems of philosophy and education (some
absurd enough) that were tried on herself and her two children by the
Princess, were adopted and abandoned with such earnestness of
purpose, such a single-eyed desire to do not only right but the
_best_, that we feel the Sacred Heart must have been touched; and we
do not wonder that our generous God should have made all things
co-operate unto good to that favored mother and son, who were by and
by to love Him with a love nothing short of heroic.
Demetrius had a prodigious memory, and in his old age could still
describe how when he was four years old he was taken to see the
Empress Catherine, who petted the pretty, fair-haired, blue-eyed
child, and then and there presented him with that ensign's commission
in the Russian army which was destined to be the source of so much
trouble. He remembered those early days and their sumptuous
elegance, in which, as to the manner born, he had been the little
tyrant, ordering about servants and serfs in most lordly style. But
soon all that was changed: he was required to live in quite a poor
way, to wait upon himself, and not to be spared the rod for childish
misdemeanors.
In a memorandum from the Princess to the children's tutor we find the
following: "Keep a sharp lookout on the children's chief faults.
Mimi is talkative, vindictive and quarrelsome; and Mitri gives me
much pain by his inveterate laziness and absurd want of pluck." Very
serious are her letters to her son, who was, after all, but a little
boy. On his fourteenth birthday she wrote to him:
"My thoughts to-day are a mixture of joy and dread. My first thought
on awaking was certainly one of joy, love and gratitude that God had
given you to me,--that He had granted me the grace to bring a soul
into the world, destined, perhaps, to eternal salvation. But, oh,
this 'perhaps'! Here came another cruel thought, fraught with fear
and great uneasiness. To-day I said to myself: 'He has lived
fourteen years, and he is still, alas! quite will-less and colorless,
creeping along life according to the lead and will-power of others.'
This terrible thought suggested the doubt whether this being I had
brought into the world could ever grow up into a man pleasing to God,
an heir of salvation; or whether, in spite of all the excellent gifts
bestowed upon him by an all-good Creator to enable him to be one of
the best and happiest of men; whether in spite of my anxieties,
prayers, entreaties, he would continue to hasten on toward
destruction.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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