PARDONER. Nay, first I beshrew your knave's heart, Ere I take part in your knavery: I will speak fair, by our[544] lady. Sir, I beseech your maship to be As good as ye can[545] be unto me. PEDLAR. I would be glad to do you good, And him also, be he ever so wood;[546] But doubt you not I will now do The thing my conscience leadeth me to. Both your tales I take for impossible, Yet take I his farther incredible. Not only the thing itself alloweth it, But also the boldness thereof avoweth it. I know not where your tale to try; Nor yours, but in hell or purgatory. But his boldness hath faced a lie, That may be tried even in this company. As if ye list to take this order, Among the women in this border, Take three of the youngest, and three of the oldest, Three of the hottest, and three of the coldest, Three of the wisest, and three of the shrewdest, Three of the chastest, and three of the lewdest,[547] Three of the lowest, and three of the highest, Three of the farthest, and three of the nighest, Three of the fairest, and three of the maddest, Three of the foulest, and three of the saddest, And when all these threes be had asunder Of each three, two justly by number Shall be found shrews, except this fall, That ye hap to find them shrews all. Himself for truth all this doth know, And oft hath tried some of this row; And yet he sweareth by his conscience, He never saw woman break patience. Wherefore, considered with true intent, His lie to be so evident, And to appear so evidently, That both you affirmed it a lie; And that my conscience so deeply So deep hath sought this thing to try, And tried it with mind indifferent; Thus I award by way of judgment: Of all the lies ye all have spent, His lie to be most excellent. PALMER. Sir, though ye were bound of equity To do as ye have done to me, Yet do I thank you of your pain, And will requite some part again. PARDONER. Marry, sir, ye can no less do, But thank him as much as it cometh to; And so will I do for my part. Now a vengeance on thy knave's heart, I never knew a pedlar a judge before, Nor never will trust pedling knave more. What doest thou there, thou whoreson noddy? 'POTHECARY. By the mass, learn to make courtesy: Courtesy before, and courtesy behind him, And then on each side, the devil blind him! Nay, when ye[548] have it perfitly, Ye shall have the devil and all of courtesy: But it is not soon learned, gentle[549] brother, One knave to make courtesy to another. Yet when I am angry, that is the worst, I shall call my master knave at the first. PALMER. Then would some master perhaps clout ye, But, as for me, ye need not doubt ye; For I had liever[550] be without ye, Than have such business about ye. 'POTHECARY. So help me God, so were ye better; What, should a beggar be a jetter?[551] It were no whit your honesty To have us twain jet after ye.