SEN. Then I beshrew thee, page, of thine age! Come hither, knave, for thine advantage; Why makest thou it so tow? TA. For mine advantage, marry, then I come. Beware, sirs, ho! let me have room! Lo, here I am! what sayest thou? SEN. Marry, thus: here is a gentleman, I say, That neither ate nor drank this day; Therefore tell me, I thee pray, If thou have any good wine. TA. Ye shall have Spanish wine and Gascon, Rose colour, white, claret, rampion, Tyre, Capric, and Malvoisin, Sack, raspice, Alicant, rumney, Greek, ipocras, new-made clary, Such as ye never had; For if ye drink a draught or two, It will make you, ere ye thence go, By Gog's body, stark mad! SEN. I wot thou art not without good wine; But here is a gentleman hath list to dine, Canst thou get him any good meat? TA. What meat, master, would ye have? HU. I care not, so God me save, So that it be wholesome to eat: I would we had a good stewed capon. SEN. As for capons ye can get none, The king's taker took up each one; I wot well there is none to get. TA. Though all capons be gone, what then? Yet I can get you a stewed hen, That is ready dight. HU. If she be fat, it will do well. TA. Fat or lean, I cannot tell, But as for this I wot well She lay at the stews all night. HU. Thou art a mad guest, by this light! SEN. Yea, sir, it is a fellow that never fails: But canst get my master a dish of quails, Small birds, swallows, or wagtails, They be light of digestion? TA. Light of digestion! for what reason? SEN. For physic putteth this reason thereto, Because those birds fly to and fro, And be continual moving. TA. Then know I a lighter meat than that. HU. I pray thee, tell me what? TA. If ye will needs know at short and long, It is even a woman's tongue, For that is ever stirring![16] HU. Sir, I pray thee, let such fantasies be, And come hither near, and hark to me, And do after my bidding. Go, purvey us a dinner even of the most Of all manner of dishes both sod and roast, That thou canst get: spare for no cost, If thou make three course. TA. Then ye get neither goose nor swan, But a dish of dregs, a dish of bran, A dish of draff, and I trow then Ye cannot get three worse! HU. What, whoreson! wouldst thou purvey Bran, draff, and stinking dregs, I say; I hold thee mad, I trow. TA. Gog's passion! said ye not thus, That I should purvey you three coarse dishes, And these be coarse enou'! HU. Three coarse dishes, quotha? What, mad fool! thou mistakest me clean! I see well thou wott'st not what I mean, And understandest amiss; I mean this wise, I would have thee To purvey meat so great plenty, That thou shouldst of necessity Serve them at three courses. That is to understand, at one word,