A Select Collection of Old English Plays, Volume 09
General
A Select Collection of Old English Plays, Volume 09
English drama
AMIN. All toward boys, good scholars of their times;
The least of these is past his accidence,
Some at _qui mihi_; here's not a boy
But he can construe all the grammar rules.
_Sed ubi sunt sodales_? not yet come?
Those _tardè venientes_ shall be whipp'd.
_Ubi est_ Pipkin? where's that lazy knave?
He plays the truant every Saturday;
But Mistress Virga, Lady Willow-by,[12]
Shall teach him that _diluculo surgere
Est saluberrimum_: here comes the knave.
_Enter_ PIPKIN.
1ST BOY. _Tardè, tardè, tardè_.
2D. BOY. _Tardè, tardè, tardè_.
AMIN. _Huc ades_, Pipkin--reach a better rod--
_Cur tam tardè venis_? speak, where have you been?
Is this a time of day to come to school?
_Ubi fuisti_? speak, where hast thou been?
PIP. _Magister, quomodo vales_?
AMIN. Is that _responsio_ fitting my demand?
PIP. _Etiam certè_, you ask me where I have been, and I say _quomodo
vales_, as much as to say, come out of the alehouse.
AMIN. Untruss, untruss! nay, help him, help him!
PIP. _Quaeso, preceptor, quaeso_, for God's sake do not whip me:
_Quid est grammatica_?
AMIN. Not whip you, _quid est grammatica_, what's that?
PIP. _Grammatica est_, that, if I untruss'd, you must needs whip me
upon them, _quid est grammatica_.
AMIN. Why, then, _dic mihi_, speak, where hast thou been?
PIP. Forsooth, my mistress sent me of an errand to fetch my master from
the Exchange; we had strangers at home at dinner, and, but for them, I
had not come _tardè; quaeso, preceptor_!
AMIN. Construe your lesson, parse it, _ad unguem
et condemnato_ to, I'll pardon thee.
PIP. That I will, master, an' if you'll give me leave.
AMIN. _Propria quae maribus tribuuntur mascula, dicas; expone, expone_.
PIP. Construe it, master, I will; _dicas_, they say--_propria_, the
proper man--_quae maribus_, that loves marrow-bones--_mascula_,
miscalled me.
AMIN. A pretty, quaint, and new construction.
PIP. I warrant you, master, if there be marrow-bones in my lesson,
I am an old dog at them. How construe you this, master, _rostra
disertus amat_?
AMIN. _Disertus_, a desert--_amat_, doth love--_rostra_, roast-meat.
PIP. A good construction on an empty stomach. Master, now I have
construed my lesson, my mistress would pray you to let me come home
to go of an errand.
AMIN. Your _tres sequuntur_, and away.
PIP. _Canis_ a hog, _rana_ a dog, _porcus_ a frog,
_Abeundum est mihi_. [_Exit_.
AMIN. Yours, sirrah, too, and then _ad prandium_.
1ST BOY. _Apis_ a bed, _genu_ a knee, _Vulcanus_, Doctor Dee:
_Viginti minus usus est mihi_.
AMIN. By _Juno's_ lip and _Saturn's_ thumb
It was _bonus, bona, bonum_.
2D BOY. _Vitrum_ glass, _spica_ grass, _tu es asinus_, you are an ass.
_Precor tibi felicem noctem_.
AMIN. _Claudite jam libros, pueri: sat, prata, bibistis_,
Look, when you come again, you tell me _ubi fuistis_.
He that minds trish-trash, and will not have care of his _rodix_.
Him I will be-lish-lash, and have a fling at his _podix_.
[_Exeunt_ BOYS.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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