A Select Collection of Old English Plays, Volume 13Dodsley, Robert
General
A Select Collection of Old English Plays, Volume 13
Dodsley, Robert
English drama
+Ear.+ And to-morrow must be the day, Moll; both of a day: one
dinner shall serve. We may have store of little ones; we must
save for our family.
+Moll.+ Good sir, what rashness was parent to this madness?
marry an old man--Ear-lack the informer!
+Blood.+ Madness! You're a whore.
+Ear.+ Is she a whore, Sim?
+Sim.+ She must be your wife, I tell-----
+Blood.+ An arrant whore, to refuse Master Innocent Ear-lack of
Rogue-land!--that for his dwelling: next, that he doth inform
now and then against enormities, and hath been blanketed--it
may be, pumped in's time; yet the world knows he does it not
out of need: he's of mighty means, but takes delight now and
then to trot up and down to avoid idleness, you whore.
+Sim.+ Good sir!
+Ear.+ Pray, father!
+Moll.+ This wound wants oil. Good sir, in all my paths
I will make you my guide; I was only startled
With the suddenness of the marriage,
In that I knew that this deserving gentleman
And I had never so much conference,
Whereby this coal of Paphos--by the rhetoric
Of his love-stealing, heart-captivating language--
Might be blown into a flame.
+Ear.+ Does she take tobacco, father?
+Blood.+ No, no, man; these are out of ballads; she has all the
Garland of Good-will[48] by heart.
+Ear.+ Snails, she may sing me asleep o' nights then, Sim.
+Sim.+ Why, right, sir; and then 'tis but tickling you o' th'
forehead with her heels, you are awake again, and ne'er the
worse man.
+Moll.+ Is he but five years older than yourself, sir?
+Ear.+ Nay, I want a week and three days of that too.
+Blood.+ I'll tell thee an old saw for't, girl--
_Old say he be, old blades are best,
Young hearts are never old._
+Ear.+ Ha, ha!
+Blood.+
_Gold is great glee, gold begets rest,
What fault is found in gold?_
+Sim.+ I will answer presently, sir, with another saw.
+Blood.+ Let's ha't, let's ha't.
+Ear.+ Mark, Moll.
+Sim.+
_Young? say she be young, young mutton's sweet,
Content is above gold;
If, like an old cock, he with young mutton meet,
He feeds like a cuckold._
+Blood.+ A very pretty pithy one, I protest; look, an' Moll do
not laugh: shalt have a pair of gloves for that. What leather
dost love?
+Sim.+ Calf, sir; sheep's too simple for me.
+Blood.+ Nay, 'tis a witty notable knave; he should never serve
me else.
_Enter +John+ with a letter._
+John.+ My mistress remembers her love, and requests you would
inure her so much to your patience as to read that.
+Blood.+ Love-letters, love-lies: dost mark, Sim; these women
are violent, Sim. Whilst I read the lie,[49] do you rail to him
upon the brewer: swear he has deceived us, and save a cup of
beer by't.
+Sim.+ I will not save you a cup at that rate, sir.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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