“Because I’m thinking, and—and you’re such a stare-cat.”
“I won’t any longer,” returned the obliging Sophy, and fixed her eyes at
once upon the ground, only now and then raising them for a furtive glance
at the motionless figure upon the fence. The mood was lasting a long
time, she thought.
It was a mild day in November, and the purple haze in the atmosphere
proved that it was Indian summer. There was a delicious smell of autumn
in the air, and the smoke of burning brush was borne to them from the
distance. One could hear sounds that seemed to come from far away, and in
the pasture which lay to the right of the pine grove, a vast number of
crows had alighted. Presently, having finished their conference, they
rose with one accord and soared far above the tops of the tallest pine
trees, cawing to one another as they went. Peter glanced up at them.
“I wish I were a crow,” said he.
Sophy gave a little sigh of relief. He had spoken; he was coming out of
his mood.
“Why?” she asked, with alacrity.
“Oh, because—” And then he stopped. Sophy sighed again, this time with
disappointment. He was not going to tell her! Presently, he again broke
the silence.
“I wish I were anything,” said he; “anything but what I am.”
“Do you wish you were a girl?” asked his little sister.
“No!” exclaimed Peter; “of course not a _girl_! But anything else. A
bird, a beetle, a squirrel. Something alive.”
This was difficult philosophy for Sophy to comprehend. Would the life of
a beetle, or even of a bird, be preferable to that of a girl? And was not
a girl “alive”? She was about to inquire further, when her brother spoke
again.
“I’m tired of it,” said he. “Just tired of it! I’m not going to stand it
any longer. I’m going to run away to sea. But if I disappear, Sophy,
don’t you tell them where I’ve gone. Don’t tell the girls that I ever
said anything about running away to sea; now mind!”
“No,” said Sophy, “I won’t, but I hope you won’t decide to go, Peter. It
wouldn’t be a bit nice without you. Why do you want to go?”
“I’ll tell you,” said Peter, leaping to the ground, and seating himself
upon a rock. The fence rail had ceased to be comfortable.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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