If by accident Sir Ronald saw any of the Leeholme Park people, he
simply bowed, raised his hat, and rode on. If he found himself in the
same room, he was courteous, calm and cold, as he would have been to
any stranger. It was so gradually done that it escaped all notice and
observation.
But if, on the one hand, all intimacy with Leeholme Park died away, Sir
Ronald accepted several invitations to Mrs. Severn’s. He remembered how
kind Clarice had been to him, how her eyes had rained down kindness and
affection upon him. There was something soothing to the Alden pride
in remembering that, if one beautiful woman had rejected him, another
was kind and gentle to him--thought more of him than all the world
besides. Of that much he was sure. It was pleasant to ride over to
Mount Severn in the warm summer sunlight to meet with a welcome from
the stately, kindly mistress, to read a warmer welcome still in the
passionate, beautiful face that seemed only to brighten in his presence.
Yet all the time, while he tried to find comfort in bright smiles and
in every pursuit to which he could possibly devote himself, he knew
that, day by day, he loved with a deeper and more passionate love.
He left Aldenmere for a time and went up to London. On this part of
his life Sir Ronald never afterward liked to reflect. He did nothing,
perhaps, unbecoming to a gentleman--he did not seek oblivion in low
society--but he lived a life of incessant gayety. He went to balls,
operas, theatres, _soirées_; he seldom saw home before daylight, and he
spent money as though it had been so much dross.
Surely, amid this glitter and dazzle, amid this turmoil of pleasure,
leaving him no time for thought, he would forget her. Fair faces
smiled upon him, siren voices spoke in honeyed accents. Sometimes in
the morning dawn, when the sky was full of pearly tints and faint
rose-clouds, he would go home and look at his haggard wistful face in
the glass.
“I am forgetting her,” he would say, exultingly; and then, Heaven be
merciful to him! when his tired eyes were closed in slumber, her face,
so fresh, so sweet and pure, would be there, looking at him, and he
would cry out with a voice full of anguish, that he was haunted and
could not escape her.
The Aldens never did anything by halves. If they loved, it was with
passionate love; if they hated--well, Heaven help us all from being the
victims of such hate.
There was something pitiful in the way this strong man struggled
against his fate, in the way he fought against the passion that had
half maddened him. When the unflagging round of gayety had tired him
he returned home. He was then but the shadow of the young and handsome
lord of Aldenmere.
“As well be haunted at home as elsewhere,” he said to himself; “I
cannot escape my fate.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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