"Yes, yes, I feel very ill," he replied, passing an to his
sleeping-room to wait with burning impatience for the following day,
which would afford him an opportunity to atone for his previous reserve
in the arms of the beautiful Madame d'Anneaud. But the next morning
brought a farewell letter from the lovely Parisienne, who informed him
that she should return at once to her home in France. It was written
with all the pride and anger of a woman who has experienced the deepest
possible humiliation; who, having offered more than was desired or
accepted, now wishes to make amends for her too great willingness to
yield by a double measure of coldness and harshness. The youth of
twenty was still too great a novice in a woman's words to perceive that
this cold reserve had as little real foundation as the pride from which
it sprung, and which with such ladies too often supplies the place of
true honor. Heinrich was hopelessly crushed, and as everything that is
denied us doubly excites our desires, the indignant woman who had cast
him off was far more charming in his eyes than when she had pleaded for
his love. Remorse and passion strove in his heart with all the fury of
the hot blood of twenty. It was the first connection of such a nature
that Heinrich had ever formed, the first great feeling of his life.
Such periods, with their secret resolutions, are those in which the
elements of the inner life are analyzed, separated from each other, or
harmoniously blended. They are the standard for the guidance of the
whole life.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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