With gay humor she described his peculiarities, and in a low tone
related how, on festival occasions and during public speeches, he often
disturbed the bystanders by repeating the words half under his breath,
and supplying the bows omitted by the orator; how he always most
dutifully repeated the last words said to him; how he invariably
removed his hat when he saw two persons salute each other in the
street, etc. etc.
"Do you know," she said, at last, "I think this proceeds from an excess
of benevolence and sympathy! It must be the same feeling that prompts
the mother who hears her daughter say a pretty thing to put on
precisely the same expression. The mother enters into her child's
situation so earnestly that she involuntarily imitates all her looks
and gestures; nay, I once saw an actress, starring with her daughter,
so carried away by the latter's playing that she unconsciously imitated
her darling, and almost merged her own part in her child's. What is
this except an excess of sympathy for the beloved being?"
She then, in a most masterly manner, imitated the different mothers and
the tragic scene of the two ladies upon the stage, so that those around
burst into shouts of laughter.
Yet the gayer the others became the more serious _Heinrich_ looked: and
she asked, with mingled surprise and anxiety, why they all had so
little success in amusing him.
"Oh, you do not know how happy I am!" he replied; "but I am reflecting
about something. I see you develop so many different traits and talents
that I am bewildered. When I have at last succeeded in harmonizing one
of your changeful moods with your whole character, before I am aware of
it a new picture appears before me, which I must again incorporate with
the whole. You keep me in a perpetual mental excitement, and it
seems as if I were compelled to sketch the different waves upon the
sea-shore. Scarcely have I fixed my eyes upon one ere it is already
swallowed up in another, and I am constantly raising my eyes again to
sketch the whole as it spreads before me in its infinite majesty."
He gazed at her with so strange an expression that she looked down as
if dazzled.
"Oh, what are you making me?" she said, in confusion. "I am a very
simple person, who am merry with the mirthful and serious with the
grave. If I am different from others in any way it is because I am
always natural. Thousands feel as keenly, change their moods as
frequently, as I; but it is not noticed in them, because they have
accustomed themselves to a uniform etiquette, an unvarying manner. I
have often envied such persons, for they know how to give themselves
the stamp of a finished individuality far better than natures like
mine, which are sometimes thought gay, sometimes melancholy, now good
and then bad, or not at all what they seem, which are sometimes too
little, sometimes too much, trusted, and rarely or never understood."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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