"Robert will soon come to an end of everything," wrote the clergyman's
wife with the frankness of long friendship. "We have heard that he was
deeply involved before he came to live at the Manor. Bertha is beginning
to look sad and worn and crestfallen. People have looked coldly on her
since you went away, and if she ever had any influence over her husband,
she has lost it now. The air is full of unwholesome rumours. I am glad
that you are no longer here, my dear child."
The letter had given Elsie a cruel pleasure--a pleasure which was so
hideous that her better self could not endure the sight of it. It was
only the darker side of her nature which could entertain this hateful
joy for a moment. And so the battle began in her heart on that sunny
March afternoon.
There were certain outer influences which seemed to act upon that inward
strife. The sky helped her with glimpses of holy blue and faint hints of
the coming spring. Even the spire of a church helped her, although it
could only point a very little way up into the far heaven. She stood
quite still, wrestling silently with that fierce temptation to rejoice
over her enemy's downfall.
All Bertha's insulting speeches and unkind actions came back into her
mind. It might be impossible to love her, but it was--it must
be--possible to be sorry for her blighted life and darkened home. Elsie
called up a vision of the dressy, well-to-do Bertha, who had always put
herself into a front place, and wondered how she could play the part of
a neglected wife, looked down upon by her neighbours and forgotten by
the world?
The thought of the crushed woman, who had so little in her interior
world to help her, was not without effect. Pity triumphed. Elsie's dark
eyes were suddenly dimmed with tears; she was grieved for Bertha and
ashamed of herself. The fight was over, and a voice within her seemed to
say that it would never have to be so fiercely fought again.
She drew a deep breath of relief as she turned away from the window,
putting the letter into her pocket. The tea-tray, with its solitary cup
and saucer, was waiting on the table, and Elsie poured out tea,
congratulating herself that she was alone. She was not an unsociable
woman; but the boarding-school, with all its noisy, merry occupants, had
set her longing for solitude. She had felt far too weary and dispirited
to enter into the fun and prattle of the girls.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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