I was sorry to hear this, because it suggested to me that her feeling
for her husband had declined even below the point of indifference. I
left Mrs. Ellmer and went downstairs to put on my mackintosh and
prepare for my tramp in the snow. The lamp in the hall had not yet
been lighted, and I was fumbling in the darkness for my deer-stalker
on the pegs of the hat-stand when I heard my name called in a hoarse
whisper from the staircase just above me. I turned, and saw the
outline of Babiole's head against the faint candle-light which fell
upon the landing above through the open door of her room.
'Mr. Maude,' she repeated, trying to clear and steady her voice.
'Where are you going?'
'Only as far as the village,' said I in a robust and matter-of-fact
tone.
'Are you going to meet Fabian?'
'Yes, if he is anywhere about.'
'Ah, I thought so!' burst from her lips in a sharp whisper. She came
down two more steps hurriedly: 'You are not to reproach him, Mr.
Maude, you are not to plead for me, do you hear? What good can you do
by interceding for a love which is dead? I was jealous when I read
that letter, but not so jealous as shocked, wounded. And now that I
have thought a little I am not jealous at all; so what right have I
to be even wounded? This lady he wrote to he has admired for a long
time, and though I never knew anything before, I guessed. She is a
beauty, her photograph is in all the windows, and a little fringe of
scandal hangs about her. She has dash, _éclat_, brilliancy; I have
heard him say so. So he is consistent, you see, after all. I can
acknowledge that now, and I don't feel angry.'
Her voice was indeed quite calm, although unutterably sad. But I
noticed and rejoiced in the absence of that bitterness which had
jarred on me so painfully in London.
'I do though,' I said gruffly.
'But you must not show it. You cannot reconcile us through the heart,
for you cannot make him a different man. You must be satisfied with
knowing that you have made me a better wife. I am just as much
stronger in heart and mind as I am in health since I have been up
here; I wanted to tell you that while I had the opportunity, to tell
you that you have cured me, and to--thank you.'
As she uttered the last words in a low, sweet, lingering tone, a light
burst suddenly upon us and showed me what the darkness had hidden--an
expression on her pale face of beautiful strength and peace, as if
indeed the quiet hills and the dark sweet-scented forests and the two
human hearts that cared for her had poured some elixir into her soul
to fortify it against indifference and neglect.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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