When we reached the house of mourning, we found Seymour anxiously
expecting us. On seeing me, he seized my hand, and, unable to speak,
kissed it repeatedly, then turned away in tears; and, I must own, at
that moment I forgot his unworthiness and my own resolution, and
remembered only his sorrow and his apparent affection. My mother _might_
be right, but I began to suspect she _might be wrong_. All these
feelings, however, were soon swallowed up in those of deep and tender
sorrow. The procession began; and, clinging to each other's arm for
support, my mother and I followed the unsteady steps of the chief
mourner. But why need I dwell on the details of a scene so common?
Suffice, that Seymour did not return with us: he remained in the church,
in order to give way to the lately suppressed agonies of his heart. My
mother wished to do the same; but she respected the sacredness of his
sorrow, and she could visit the vault at another time.
The rest of the day was spent by Seymour in visits to those who had been
maintained or assisted by Lady Helen, in order that he might personally
assure them that his intention was to do all she would have done, had
life been spared to her. Having thus performed his duty to the utmost,
he appeared to my mother's eye to have recovered some of his usual
brilliancy of countenance. The next night he was to return to Oxford. In
the afternoon of that day, he called at our house, and requested to see
my mother and _me_.
I rose involuntarily, in great perturbation.
"Tell Mr. Pendarves," said my mother, "that I will wait on him directly.
Helen, my child! it is but one struggle more, and all the difficulty
will be over; for I conclude, you, not only in obedience to my will, but
in compliance with your own wise _wishes_, refuse to see him!"
What could I say? Could I tell her that the meeting of yesterday, and
his subsequent conduct towards his mother's dependants, had altered my
feelings? I could not do it, and I remained above stairs.
After a long conference, my mother came back to me, and I heard the
hall-door close. Till this moment, I had hoped she would relent, and
allow me to see him! at least, I guess so, from the cold chill which I
felt at my heart, when I heard the noise of the closed door. However, I
saw him from the window--I myself unseen--and his handkerchief was held
to his eyes.
When my mother returned, I observed that she had been excessively moved,
and the traces of recent tears were on her cheeks.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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