England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Lawyers -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Young men -- Fiction
The time had passed when he could say, "It will wait." That had been
right when he said it; to hurry matters then would have been to fail.
But she had been brought to a point when a decision could be risked.
Risked it must be, not only because his feelings ardently demanded an
end to his suit, but lest he should become ridiculous in his own eyes.
Dangling and philandering were not to his taste. He had got a dangerous
notion into his head--that she would keep him hanging on and off to the
end of the chapter. He had often seen men cheated like that, and had
laughed at them. His passion was strong in him now, but his masculine
pride was equal to fighting it. He had himself on the curb. He could and
would leave her unless he could stay on his own terms. To tell her that
might involve cruelty to her; he did not stand on the scruple. There
were scruples enough and to spare, if a man began to reckon them, in an
affair of this kind. They were in the nature of the case. What animal
can live and thrive that does not add cunning to courage, trickery to
daring? He liked neither being cruel to her nor tricking those about
her; but for the moment these things had to be done. There should be an
end of them soon; he promised himself that and found comfort in the
promise.
But she fought him with a pertinacity that surprised him; he had not in
his heart expected so stout a resistance.
"It's not in the least for me to decide whether you come to Hilsey or
not," she told him roundly. "It's entirely for you. I ask you to pay me
a visit. Come or not as you like, Sir Oliver."
"But what does it mean if I do come?"
"I don't know. I'm not a prophet."
He put on no melodramatic airs. His manner was quiet and friendly still.
"You're a very provoking woman." He smiled. "I hate to be abrupt--well,
I don't think I have been--but this thing's got to be settled."
"Has it? Who says so? What is there to settle?"
"You're being tempestuous now." He threw her own word back at her, with
a laugh. "And you know quite well what there is to settle." He looked at
her stormy little face with love and tender amusement. But his answer he
meant to have.
"Settle, settle, settle! How many thousand times have you used that
word? I think I hate you, Sir Oliver."
"I begin to think myself that you don't love me. So I'd best be off on
my business."
"Yes, I really think you had. And when you come back, perhaps we can
consider----"
"Oh, dear me, no, we can't!"
She looked at him for an instant. Again he made her eyes dim. He hated
himself at the moment, but it seemed to him that there was nothing to do
but stick to his course. Else, whatever he felt now, he would feel
to-morrow that she had fooled him. She sat looking very forlorn, her
handkerchief clenched in her hand, ready to wipe away the tears. He went
and leant over her.
"Dearest, forgive me. You must think how I feel. Can't you love and
trust me?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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